The Winds of Winter
by rantandrumour
Summary: It's been eleven months and everyone in CID has done what they could to help her. She's gotten better, but it still hurts. But the winter winds are coming and with them a change. But is the change for the better? .(And I actually don't kill Alex?) EDIT: now rated M for smut
1. Chapter 1

**Thanks to 'ohthestuffoflegend' on tumblr, this all came out suddenly, which i actually think helped because i needed a break from writing Mark's baby story stuff on fictionpress because lets be honest, I've been working on that shit for nearly a year and jesus, i needed a distraction.**

**But she still made me feel too much with her nice little analysis of Alex leaving Gene and neither of them getting anything in the end... ow...it hurts...**

Alex Drake looked out the window of Luigi's. _It's winter,_ she thought sadly to herself as she watched the snow fall gently onto the ground. Inside, the pub was noisy. The lads were changing the lyrics to Christmas carols, and a fire was roaring in the fireplace. There was a tree in the corner of the trattoria, and fairy lights twinkled around the bar.

"You doing okay, ma'am?" Shaz asked, sitting next to her.

"Yeah," Alex said, looking down at the pint of beer someone had bought her earlier in the night. "Sometimes, I just can't believe how the year has gone."

"You know the Guv wouldn't want you to be moping about. Especially not now. Not at Christmas."

"I know. Christmas is a time of cheer and good will toward men," Alex responded sarcastically.

"And chasing criminal bastards around to get back what they've nicked," Ray said, sitting down across from her.

"I didn't realise you were even listening," Alex said, giving a small smile.

"Yeah, we stopped singing because Chris about died laughing with 'Oh _Come_ All Ye Faithful'. He's in the back, still giggling. Poof." Ray took a long drag on a cigarette.

Shaz rolled her eyes good-naturedly. "I'll go get him sorted," she said.

"I'm sure she will," Ray said in an undertone to Alex, waggling his eyebrows.

Alex stifled a laugh. Her smile faded soon after, however, and she was back to brooding over her pint.

Ray cleared his throat, slightly uncomfortable. Although he and Alex had grown closer since Gene had disappeared at the end of January, he was not able to handle outpourings of emotion. It just wasn't one of his talents.

"You doing okay?" he finally asked.

"You know, you're the sixth person to ask me that today?" Alex responded, studying him for a moment.

"You just seem more out of it today. Like you were back in February, after they changed the Guv's status to 'missing and presumed dead'.

"It's just the holidays getting to me," Alex said, pretending that the words Ray had spoken didn't break her heart. "We would always spend them in the office together, since neither of us had any family to go to. Now I'm going to be in the office with a DCI who doesn't believe that women belong on the force."

"You know we could switch, if you want to. I'm supposed to work Boxing Day with Chris. No Dannell in sight."

Alex smiled. "As nice as that sounds, I can't. Dannell will give me hell and you know it."

Ray sighed. "You're right. Sodding bastard. God, I miss the Guv."

"We all do," Alex said softly, remembering back to January. Gene had simply gone to meet a snout. It was a perfectly routine matter of business and no one had thought anything of it, until three hours had passed and he hadn't come back.

Gene had said that he was meeting with Robert 'Rancid' Jameson. They had gone out to find the man, but Rancid had been lying dead by a skip, along with Gene's warrant card and Quattro key. They had found the Quattro a few streets away, but it was no longer the pristine red car Gene had loved so dearly. Someone had slashed all the tyres, and the windows had been smashed out. Dents covered the car, as though someone had hit it repeatedly with a sledgehammer. They had called out a missing person's report on him, but after that, it was up to Fenchurch West to get anything done.

However, with nothing to go on, they hadn't gotten very far.

After a few weeks, Gene's case had been deemed cold, and he was declared dead. This had been too much for Alex, and she had had to take a few weeks of compassionate leave.

It still agonised her to this day that Gene was gone. She had shared a level of trust with him that she had never shared with anyone before, not even Pete. He was the only one whom she had let her guard down around. He was able to see all of her imperfections, her weak moments, and she didn't mind him seeing them.

She had been the same for him. He had given her glimpses into his past as well, told her things that no one else on the team would know. On the top, he was all swagger and bullshit, but underneath that layer, he was genuine and caring. She knew that he cared about her. He had proven that more than once.

What she wasn't sure of – what she would never be sure of – was if he loved her or not.

Alex had realised that she loved him over a year before. They had been at a conference in Lewes on Bonfire Night. Together, they had gone to the giant bonfire that night. They had stood together, watching it burn, enjoying the festivities and talking amongst others. Later that night, she had seen him as the bonfire dwindled, staring into the flames. His face glowed in the firelight, and Alex had known he was miles away at that time. She knew that he was brooding over something, and she had known to leave him alone at that time. But it was that moment when she realized that she loved the man.

Someone had pushed into her then and she had looked away. By the time she looked up, Gene was no longer staring at the bonfire. Instead he was next to her, saying he was ready to leave.

When Gene had disappeared, she had still admitted nothing to him, too afraid of what he might do when she admitted such a thing. She was afraid that he wouldn't love her back. And now, he was gone and he would never know how she felt. _She _would never know how _he _felt. Any opportunity they had was over.

"_Signorina, Signore,_" Luigi said gently. "I am closing now. You must leave."

Ray nodded at the man. Since Gene had disappeared, Luigi had gotten much less abuse from CID. It seemed as though they had only insulted him to make Gene happy.

"We're just leaving," Alex said, smiling at him. Luigi smiled back, albeit a little sadly. He was able to sense her moods, and could tell whether she needed to be babbled out of a sad mood, or to be left alone to brood.

"_Buonanotte,"_ Luigi said as they left.

"Night, ma'am," Ray said as she went to the stairs behind Luigi's.

"Night, Ray. I'll see you tomorrow."

"At least Dannell will be gone tomorrow. He's got a meeting at Scotland Yard."

"Thank God," she said, truly meaning it. She walked up the stairs to her flat, stopping outside of it, concerned. Her door was open. She left it unlocked sometimes, but it was never open when she got home. She wished Ray had not left yet. She would have gone down and asked him to accompany her upstairs, just to check the flat over. As it was, all she had was an Italian downstairs who had closed up the restaurant for the night. Still, being armed with a knife would be better than being armed with nothing.

Quietly, she backed away from the door and walked down the stairs that led into Luigi's restaurant. She knew this door would be unlocked until Luigi went upstairs for the night.

Alex entered the restaurant and went into the kitchen, where Luigi and his staff were cleaning up the dishes from the night and preparing for the next day. As she walked in, they all looked up.

"_Signorina, _are you okay?" Luigi asked, concerned.

"I think someone is in my flat," she said softly. "I need a knife or something. My gun is at work."

Luigi, looking worried, nodded and handed her a large knife. "I am coming with you, _signorina," _he said, grabbing a cleaver for himself. "I am not allowing you to go in there by yourself."

Alex nodded. A man and woman armed with two enormous sharp objects might be enough to put off someone with a gun.

They walked up the stairs silently, stopping at the top. "I'll go in first, Luigi," she whispered. "When we get in, stay quiet until we've investigated the whole flat."

Luigi nodded, holding his cleaver a little higher. Alex walked in front of him and pushed the door open silently, quietly entering into the flat.

She looked around the kitchen, seeing no one and walked into the living room.

"Bloody flaming Nora," she swore, making a mental note that she was spending too much time with Ray.

Luigi, right behind her, dropped his cleaver on the floor. He uttered several curse words in Italian, each one said with a little less force until he was completely silent.

A man was lying on her couch. His long, dirty-blond hair was stained with blood and his clothes were ripped and torn. They swamped his figure, and she could tell that the man had been starved for quite a while. His feet were bare, and there were open wounds over his knuckles. He was face down on her couch, facing toward the wall. One of his legs flopped off the sofa, and one arm was tucked underneath the pillow, the other bent next to his chest.

"Gene?" she whispered, dropping the enormous knife. It had to be him. She knew it had to be him. However, there was no response from the man lying on her couch.

Fear forgotten, Alex walked over to him and knelt down next to the couch, putting her hand on the man's back. She could easily feel his spine through his clothes. Alex could feel a lump in her throat, but swallowed it, saying Gene's name once more.

The man jumped suddenly, tensing up, his hands curling into fists. Alex backed away nervously, not anticipating the hostile reaction. However, as the man became aware of his surroundings, his tensed muscles slowly relaxed.

"Bolly?" he asked quietly. Alex's heart broke at the sound of his voice. It was soft and hoarse, carrying none of the authority it had done once before. His eyes were dark and hollow, and one was tinged green underneath. His nose looked as though it had been broken at least once, and there was a long cut down his cheek.

"Gene," she murmured, moving back closer to him. "We thought you were dead."

He shook his head, his long hair flying out. "Far from it. Got close a few times, but I persevered, me." He smiled bitterly. "They wouldn't let me die."

Tears were falling freely from Alex's eyes. Luigi was still standing next to the chair. Gene noticed both knives glinting on the floor and looked at her.

"Were you going to finish the job?" he asked.

Alex hoped he was joking, but his tone was so mild, so _hurt_, that it seemed impossible. He was looking at her almost as a man dying of thirst would look at water, the desperation evident in his eyes.

"We didn't know who was in my flat," she explained.

Gene raised his eyebrows in acknowledgement and nodded once. "Seems as good of reason as any," he muttered to himself. "I helped myself to some food and water," he said in a sudden topic change. "I hope that's okay."

"Of course it is," Alex responded, tears still flowing down her face. She pitied this man, a shadow of what he used to be. Usually Gene would have stormed in here, demanded food, and whined that it was only suitable for women and rabbits. Now, he was seeking her approval.

"Luigi," she said, still staring at Gene. "Do you have some leftovers from tonight that Gene might possibly be able to have?"

"_Si, signorina," _Luigi said, still staring in open mouthed shock. He picked up his utensils and backed out of the room, leaving the two of them alone.

"Gene, what happened to you?"

Gene's face hardened for a moment. "I went to meet Rancid, but he was dead by the time I got there. Bastards jumped me and knocked me out. I woke up in their pissing flat and they had the time of their lives beating the shit out of me."

"How did you get out?" she asked, knowing there was much more to the story that he wasn't telling her.

"I didn't. They threw me in the Thames. My hands and feet were tied together."

Alex just noticed the rope burn on his wrists. "How did you survive?" she whispered, wanting nothing more than to sit by him and hold him in her arms. However, he was giving off the feeling that he didn't want anyone to touch him, and she respected that.

"I flexed a bit when they were tying the ropes around my wrists. That made them loose enough that I could slip out. Once I got to shore, I untied my feet."

He lapsed into silence once more, staring at her, seeming to drink her in.

"You need to be checked out by hospital."

"Fat chance of that," he said, sounding like the old Gene for a moment. "I'm not going anywhere near one."

Alex bit her cheek, surprised at how quickly she could get annoyed at him. "Fine. You won't go tonight. But tomorrow, you _are_ going to get checked out."

"Or what?" he challenged.

"There is no 'or what.' You are going. You've been missing for eleven months. You come back here, emaciated and bruised, and you think you're fine. All those open wounds on your hands? Who knows what the Thames water has in it?"

"Just put some ointment on my hands and I'll be good as new. _Please_, Alex. Don't make me see one."

Alex, shocked by the sudden use of the word 'please,' stopped and looked at him. There was something he was hiding, a real reason why he didn't want to go to hospital. And she was going to find out why.

There was a knock at the door as Luigi entered with a plate full of steaming food. "For you, _signore_ Hunt. On the house."

"I hope so," Gene muttered. "I haven't got any bloody money." He nodded at the Italian in thanks, staring in wonder at the food. Alex walked Luigi out, thanking him for the food and coming up to defend her for the night. After she bid him off, she walked back to where Gene was slowly savouring the spaghetti.

"I haven't seen this much food in ages," he admitted to her. "Tastes amazing."

Alex felt her heart breaking for him again, but knew that eventually he would be back to normal. She would make sure of that.

"Gene," she said quietly. "How would you feel about staying with me for a few weeks?"

**Sorry if this isn't up to the quality of my other fics. It's been a year since I've played with these two and to have _Gene _screwed up is not something I'm really used to...**


	2. Chapter 2

**So, I know that it's been over a week, but I had trouble deciding where to take this. With that and my lovely 12 hour shifts at the hospital, along with getting in a second car accident in a month (JFC LIFE), and having a general life outside of tumblr (whaaa?) I haven't been able to write as much as I wanted. I DID get like the final 1/4 in today, which was almost more than I'd written at one sitting in a while. It was just difficult to get into Gene's mindset, but I think I've adapted to him a bit more. I'm too used to torturing Alex!**

**Chapter 2**

For the third night in a row, Gene woke up screaming. Every night when he fell asleep, he was back in the hell hole that he had lived in for eleven months. He hated that it affected him like it had. He was the Manc Lion. He shouldn't be waking up from his sleep, screaming like a pansy. And he was letting Alex down. He could see the disappointment in her eyes every single time she looked at him. He couldn't protect her anymore. He was useless.

As expected, there was a soft knock on the door. "Yeah," he said flatly, propping himself up in the bed.

"You okay?" Alex asked from outside.

"Fine, Bolls," he sighed, staring at the crack underneath the door where a light and her shadow was visible. He could almost feel the tension as she debated whether or not to ask him if he needed anything. She wanted to analyse him, he could tell.

"You can come in, Alex," he said, his tone still totally flat. After a moment, the door opened, Alex walking in cautiously. She had no idea how to deal with him anymore; he could tell that from the way she approached. She sat carefully on the foot of her own bed. When she had offered to let him stay for a while, she had insisted on letting him use her bed. If had been a year earlier, he would have fought her tooth and nail. But now, barely being a man, he had accepted after a few weak protests.

"Nightmare again?" she asked softly, her eyes glittering in the low light.

"What do you think?" he asked bluntly.

"Nightmares aren't something to be ashamed of," she said.

"I know. I went through a terrible trauma and it's only to be expected, right?"

Alex nodded, and he could see the disappointment in her eyes. "You can't expect to go away from something like that unscathed. I mean, Christ, you nearly drowned in the Thames, and then once you got out of that, nearly froze to death on the way here."

"I don't need a reminder," Gene said, looking away from her face, away from the eyes that labelled him a failure.

He could feel her recoil against his brush off, but she stayed on the edge of the bed, just as persistent as she always was. She was silent for several long moments until he finally spoke again.

"You haven't been to work in a few days."

"I told you that I was going to stay and make sure that you were alright before I headed back." She was leaving something unsaid – Gene could feel it hovering between them – but he let it go.

"Have you told them why? That I'm back?"

"No," she answered honestly, looking down at the floor. "Without you there beside me, they'd probably think I'd finally gone mad. I didn't handle your disappearance so well."

"Oh?"

She shook her head, unwilling to talk about it. Gene accepted this for now; when she had tried to get him to open up about his time in captivity he had fobbed her off as well.

"What about Luigi?"

"I asked him not to say anything. He was tactful enough to not say anything to his staff the night of."

"I thought that bloody man could never keep his mouth shut," Gene muttered to himself, but loudly enough for Alex to hear.

Alex smirked at his comment before looking at him and speaking once more. "I think he realised with you showing up in the state you were in, that we probably shouldn't mention anything until you said something. He did want to ring the police though."

A wave of panic filled Gene and he looked up at her. "No," he said fiercely. "You can't tell the police that I'm alive."

Alex frowned. "Why not? We could start looking for the men who did this, Gene!"

"Alex, I know who did this to me." Gene could feel the weight of his words as he said them. Alex's eyes opened in shock and amazement, and he could almost feel the thrum of copper's energy that was starting up inside her.

"You know?" she asked, her voice carefully calm.

"I've known since the day they took off my blindfold, Bolls," he said wearily. "That's why I need to stay dead for now. If I stay dead, I can get my vengeance."

"Gene, what you're talking about is taking the law into your own hands," Alex said seriously, somewhat shocked. "You can't do that!"

"To hell I can't," he scoffed. "Do you know what they did to me in there?"

He could see anger on her face, but when her voice spoke, it was full of utter rage. "No, because you won't sodding tell me."

"Some psychiatrist you are!"

"_It's psychologist," _she said automatically, suddenly starting to laugh.

"What the bloody hell are you laughing about? We were just in the middle of a fight, you mad cow."

"Do you know how long it's been since I've had to correct someone about psychology?"

"About as long as the time I've been missing?" he asked.

The tension in the room had diffused with her laughter, but as he asked his question, it started to build once again. He looked into her eyes, finding that disappointment there. Gene clenched his jaw, wanting to ask her a question, but worried that it might make him seem like a poof. Finally, he swallowed his shame and spoke into the silence that stretched once more.

"Why are you so disappointed in me, Alex?"

"What are you talking about?" she asked, stunned.

"I can see it in your eyes every time you look at me," he accused. "You're disappointed in me."

"Gene," she said, her mouth hanging open at her loss for words. "I'm...I'm not disappointed in you." She stopped, trying to fathom more words to say.

Gene just looked at her, waiting for an explanation. He looked into her eyes again, and saw the disappointment there, plain as day. Only...it wasn't quite disappointment he was looking into, was it?

"I was wrong," he breathed. "You aren't disappointed. You pity me."

The idea of pity was worse than the idea of disappointment. He was the Manc Lion for God's sake! He was never supposed to be _pitied. _People were supposed to cringe in fear anytime he walked into the room.

"_But I'm not that lion anymore," _he reminded himself. _"I'm weak, broken...useless."_

"I feel _sorry_ for you Gene. I feel sympathetic. I cannot understand what you went through in there, but I can feel sorry that you had to go through it. The only thing that I am disappointed about is that you think you cannot tell us who kidnapped you, that you think you have to go after them yourself."

Gene clenched his jaw at her words. She didn't know. She couldn't understand. How would he possibly be able to tell her who the men were? She knew them She trusted the men, just as he had a year before. He had trusted them with his life, and then they had tried to take it by throwing him in a river. Memories of the year spent in captivity washed over him. He had tried fighting at first, of course he had. In the end, however, it had been useless. They had starved him within an inch of his life and then, only then, had they started to break him. By the day that they had thrown him into the river, he had been weaker than he had imagined possible. His days had been spent staring out the window across from him, and his nights had been spent trying to find a comfortable position when handcuffed to a wall. He knew which man meant what. One meant food. Another meant torture. A third would simply talk. The fourth mocked before beating him. And if all four came in the room at the same time... Any time that the four men came in together, he wasn't able to remember anything for days afterward.

Gene remembered waking up one morning to the four of them over him, how they promised that he would scream louder than he had ever imagined. Their promise had come true, and then some. They had drawn tears of pain and agony from his eyes, and in the moments before the world went black, he had hoped for his death, something that hadn't happened since his childhood. He had woken up to the Talking Man over him. The man had talked for hours that day, drilling right into the headache Gene had woken up with. The man said that Gene had almost died.

Gene still wished he had.

"Gene?" Alex said. It seemed as though her voice was coming from miles away. After a few seconds, however, he remembered where he was.

"Gene," Alex said again. "If you do go after them, traumatised or no, I _will _turn you in."

"Stop whinging at me," Gene snapped. "Get out!"

Alex seemed surprised at his sudden change in mood, and stood her ground. "I'm not getting out until you swear to me that you won't go after them, Gene."

Gene clenched his teeth. How had he forgotten how completely infuriating Alex could be? All these months, he had imagined getting back to her. When he got himself out of the river, her flat was the only place that he thought about going. But now, he wanted to leave and never see her again. He wanted to yell and scream at her until he got his way, like he used to.

But he was a kitten, unable to even fend for himself.

Finally, he sighed. "I won't," he said, making his voice sound careworn and tired. There was a part of him that felt distinctly uncomfortable with lying to Alex, but the less she knew, the better off she would be. "Just please still, don't tell anyone I'm still alive. I want to get a little better before I have to see anyone."

Alex stared at him a moment, but nodded. "Okay," she said. "I'm not good at cooking though. I'll bring in groceries for you to eat, but I think you should go on a nutrition supplement as well. You'll only be eating liquids for the next few weeks though, so that'll be easier to cook."

Gene shrugged. As long as she was off the topic of his captors, he would agree to anything she said. Besides, he wasn't surprised at her telling him she was going to buy him nutrition supplements. She had mentioned it the day before as well, but had stayed with him to make sure that he was okay. Gene didn't really want to drink them, but he only had to look at his starved, emaciated form and know that he probably needed them. He could count his ribs, and his cheeks were hollow. His eyes were sunken into his skull, the hopelessness magnified by the dark rings underneath. Alex had told him that he was supposed to stick to clear liquid food in the beginning, and then move to liquids that were opaque. From there, they would introduce real food. She said that this would help stop 'refeeding syndrome,' which was potentially fatal. Alex had given a long-winded explanation about it, but he couldn't remember anything about it.

"I'll take another day off tomorrow, just to end out the week. I'm off this weekend. We can buy you some clothes that fit and I can stock up on groceries."

Gene looked at the duvet. "I don't think I can go out there looking like this, Bolls," he said quietly.

He saw the pity in her eyes once more and hated himself for saying anything. "I understand," she said softly. "Why don't I measure your waist tomorrow morning, and I'll get you a belt and some trousers."

He hated that idea as well, but that was preferable to going out in public. Besides, if he was out in public, there was always the chance that someone would see him. And right now, he didn't want to be seen. He would be found after he took out the men that nearly killed him. Every. Single. One.

**So this kind of took an unexpected turn this chapter and there is MAJOR plot and stuff so this is probably going to be longer than a three shot...ебать... **

**Anyway, for those of you who have never heard of refeeding syndrome, it's basically what can happen to people who go without eating for more than 5 days or so. You see it in people with anorexia. If you introduce normal food too early, electrolytes and the vitamins in your body can get out of whack, leading to cardiac arrhythmias (funky heartbeats), coma, confusion, and possibly death. I was forbidden from killing Gene or Alex by Eleantris, so therefore, Gene couldn't get refeeding syndrome and die. (dammit...)**

**Also, if you're like WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAIT GENE HAD SPAGHETTI LAST CHAPTER! WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING RANT?! Refeeding syndrome starts after a few days. Your body wouldn't be used to the nutrition that BAM all of a sudden it's getting, so one has to introduce that nutrition slowly. (Like going ONE day without a pill and then taking it the next day. You're fine that one day, but if you start missing more than that, you run into problems. :) )**


	3. Chapter 3

**So I'm terrible about updating, yes, but lately I can only write in pencil, and do you know how much it sucks to transcribe everything? Ugh... I know sort of where this is going, but it's going to be a lot longer than a threeshot...oops. Damnit. **

**Chapter 3**

It had been over a month since Gene had shown up on her couch, and Alex was still no closer to figuring out what happened to him. He was quiet and subdued during the day, dutifully eating the broths and soups she set in front of him at first, and then later the actual food that Luigi would bring up.

The problem was, Alex was unsure of how to handle Gene. A year ago, he had been predictable. She would wind him up, and he'd blow his top. He would do the exact same to her. As Chris had once said, they would just yell and throw things until the other one gave up. He didn't yell anymore. If she broached a subject that he didn't want to talk about, he'd snap at her, and then get quiet. Alex could tell when he did this, he was being haunted by the memories. He still vehemently refused to talk about anything that happened to him, or to venture outside the flat.

She was surprised at this. In the past, he could not stay in the same place for more than a few hours, except for during stakeouts. The Gene of the past would have never been able to stay in her flat more than a night without venturing out, even if it was only down to Luigi's, or down to the off-license.

There was another thing that had changed. Gene, a heavy drinker, borderline alcoholic twelve months previously, never drank anymore. He didn't smoke either. Alex knew the reason for that had to be rooted in the trauma he had experienced, but again, he wasn't talking.

Alex stirred her tea quietly, listening to the man snoring on the sofa. After he had gotten some strength back, he had made her take the bed again. He was still nowhere near as strong as the lion he had once been, but he had put on several pounds, and it was more difficult to see the outlines of his ribs on his stomach. Part of that, she knew had to do with the nutrition milkshakes she still made him drink twice a day. His portion sizes were getting bigger, but he was still only barely getting the minimum Caloric intake needed to keep him healthy. If he was to put on weight, he needed several hundred more Calories, and that was where the nutrition shakes came in. Alex knew Gene hated them, but he still drank them nonetheless.

The snoring in the living room stopped, and a few minutes later, Gene sat down across from her at her kitchen table. His eyes were still sorrowful and closed off, but there was no longer the total desperation that she had seen a month earlier.

"You working today?" he asked, pouring himself a mug of tea.

Alex nodded. "I hate the weekend shift."

"I always did too. Made it better when you were there though." He offered the tiniest of smiles at her and she gave it back warmly.

"I wish," she said. "I've got ruddy Dannell to work with today. It'll be a bundle of laughs, as always."

"Is he still threatening you to be demoted?"

Alex sighed. "When is he not? Luckily the Super knew me before Dannell, and he knows the kind of work I am able to do. He's talking about possibly getting me a transfer to Scotland Yard. No more shift work, at least."

"Be nice to have every Saturday off," Gene offered.

"I think so too," Alex said softly, thinking. Would it be worth leaving the rest of the team to get off of shift work? After all, besides Dannell, she liked everyone. And she would trust every single one with her life, even Dannell. He may be a bastard, but he was an honest bastard.

"Carling and Skelton going to be there?"

Alex nodded. "The 'A' team," she said, smiling softly.

"Missing its most valuable asset," Gene muttered.

"You should come back, Gene," Alex said.

"No! The world thinks I'm dead, Bolly. I'm not coming back just yet."

"What are you waiting for then?"

There was a short pause before he responded. "I've got to be strong to face the world, don't I? Look at me. I'm like a cat that just figured out it had feet."

Alex knew that the next statement would cause him to silence himself, but she decided to try anyway. "It may help if you try to let some of it out," she said quietly.

"Fine," Gene said, surprising her. "What do you want to know about? Was it the week on end where I saw absolutely no one, and was chained to a wall? I just sat there, watching the sun go up, and then watching it reflect in the windows across from me when it set. Or, how about the time I was beaten so badly that they thought I would die? Where one of the men said I'd been slipping in and out of consciousness for days, but was never oriented? Or how about if, when they got bored of torturing me, or if they were waiting for me to heal, they'd go and piss on me, just for laughs? There. I've let some of it out. When do I start feeling better?"

His voice had grown more bitter and jaded with each sentence, and he was staring at her coldly, his chest heaving.

"You poor man," she murmured. "God, Gene..."

"There's a reason I don't talk about it, Alex. And something tells me if you had gone through that, you wouldn't be baring the details to me too easily, either. I'll get it out when I'm ready to. But let it rest."

Swallowing a lump in her throat, Alex nodded. "Fine," she said softly. "I'll leave it be."

"Good."

The silence stretched between them once more, this time slightly awkward, until Alex finally sighed and stood, downing the rest of her lukewarm tea.

"I better go. Dannell will murder me if I'm late."

Gene merely nodded. "I'll see you tonight."

"I might stop by at lunch to check on you, but don't fret if I don't. You thnk you can make it?"

"It'll be tough, but I think I can manage," Gene said dryly.

Alex gave a small smile as she walked out of the door, closing it to leave him alone once more. She walked over to CID, dreading the day already. She really should switch over to Sctoland Yard. The job would be much less stressful, more like her job had been before she had transferred to Fenchurch. Although, honestly, what kind of psychologist was she? She had been _living _with Gene for a month, and still had not been able to get him to open up to her. If she was any good at her job, shouldn't she have gotten to him by now?

_This is Gene Hunt, _Alex reminded herself. _He's been wounded, but he's still got similar qualities to the man I remember. He's not going to open up until he's ready and too much prodding will shut him down._

CID was still quiet as Alex walked in. She had to be at least ten minutes early or Dannell would yell at her about proper use of time. He would then go into a rant about how women didn't belong in the police. They were too concerned about their makeup or hair to do any proper work.

"Morning, Ma'am," Shaz said wearily as Alex walked in.

"Morning Shaz. You look like you were up all night."

"I nearly was. Dannell wanted a bunch of things filed, and I got home gone two. I came back at half seven."

"Jesus Shaz. You should have called in today."

Shaz shook her head. Dannell would kill me. And besides, who are you to tell me to call in? You still look just as ill as you did when you had the flu last month."

Alex's excuse for calling in for a week straight had been the flu. By the time she had gone back, the mixture of sleeping on the sofa, and Gene's frequent night time awakenings had made her look ill. It was all for the better really. And though a few people – mostly Shaz – had come up to check on her, she had only spoken to them through a chained door. Alex hadn't been extremely concerned. Gene had mostly slept for the first week after his release, but she wasn't taking any chances. CID gossiped like old women. And if the Guv was back...

"Drake, stop standing there looking like a gormless twat and start doing actual work," Dannell snapped suddenly.

"Good morning to you too, sir," Alex said sweetly, knowing it would just piss him off.

She was right. Dannell turned a dark shade of red as his lips turned white. However, he kept his mouth shut, and Alex went to her desk. She started looking through the stack of reports that she still had to do. Since Dannell had taken over, she had a lot more time in the office and a lot less on the streets. That work was saved for the men, because they were able to protect their own arse. Alex protested this vehemently every time they went to a crime scene, and won as often as not. So far, she had yet to get into a situation where she needed someone else to protect her. It was just the savage misogyny that Dannell held that kept her back.

"Boss," Ray said, standing next to her. He had already lit up, and she waved the cigarette smoke out of her face.

"What do you want Ray?"

"Are you going to Luigi's tonight?"

At that moment, her phone rang. "CID," she said, ignoring Ray to answer the phone.

"_We're out of bacon," _Gene said in place of a standard greeting.

"You...you're not serious?"

'_I would never joke about bacon, Bolly."_

"I didn't mean the bloody bacon. I meant the fact that you felt the need to ring me at work about it. Could it not have waited until tonight?"

"_I was hoping to make a butty."_

"Go buy one."

"_I'm not leaving the flat, Alex. You know that."_

"Then ask Luigi. I can't leave work to buy you bacon and you know that."

Gene sighed heavily down the phone. _"What about lunch?"_

Alex took a deep breath in, willing herself to stay calm. "Fine. I'll bring you bacong over lunch. Are you happy now?"

"_Very," _ Gene said, sounding extremely smug.

"Okay, I'll see you at lunch." She hung up before he could get another word in, her stomach dropping as she saw Ray's grinning face.

"Who are you getting bacon for?" he asked.

"No one," she replied, starting to sort through her paper work again.

"Are you sure about that ma'am? Because it certainly sounded like someone."

"Ray, leave the ma'am alone," Shaz said as she exited the canteen with a cup of tea. Who she's on the phone with doesn't matter to you!"

"It does if the person on the other end is male! I could hear the voice a bit. She's getting bacon for a man at her flat, Shazza."

"Ma'am, do you have a boyfriend?"

"She's bloody living with him!" Ray crowed. Alex knew why he was so excited. He loved gossip in any form, and would soon be spreading this new rumour around the station.

"What's his name?" Ray asked.

"What does he look like?" questioned Shaz.

"How long have you been with him?" Dannell asked sarcastically. "Drake, Granger, Carling. Stop giggling like school girls and get some work done. Actually...Drake, my office."

Alex sighed deeply, knowing that she was going to get a bollocking. Maybe he was going to try to make her redundant. Surely he'd have to go through the super on matters like that though?

Alex sat down in the chair provided in front of the desk. Dannell closed the door and shut the curtain on it, and then sat down across from her.

"Okay, Drake. I give up. What's going on with you?"

Alex was speechless. Of all the words to hear come out of her DCI's mouth, those she had expected the least.

"How...what...how do you mean sir?"

"It doesn't take a detective to notice that you've been acting oddly, Drake. I've been here for ten months. This past month you've been nervous and exhausted. And any idiot could tell by the look on your face when Carling gave you the twenty questions that you didn't have a boyfriend. So I reiterate. What. Is. Going. On." The last sentence was a command, rather than a question.

Alex looked down at the ground, trying to find a decent excuse. Gene was 'dead'. If she told the truth, they'd think her mad, and she would have betrayed him.

"Well?"

Alex swallowed nervously. "A piece of my past that I thought was gone forever reappeared suddenly last month," she said honestly. "I've been dealing with it since."

"What piece of your past?" Dannell asked, narrowing his eyes.

"It's personal, sir," Alex said, looking down.

"Fair enough," he said, surprising Alex again. "If you do need to talk, Drake, I'm here."

Alex stared at him in total disbelief. He realised how stunned she was and gave her the first smile she had seen in the ten months they had worked together. "You think I hate you, don't you Drake?"

"I...was under a certain impression, sir," she replied uncertainly.

"To be honest, in the beginning, I did. But you've gone up in my estimations since then. Drake, you're what holds this department together."

"Thank you?" Alex said, really unnerved now.

"I mean it. I'm tough on you, yes, but I can't be seen going back on my rules. Your men loved DCI Hunt, and I have to establish that I'm different from him. I have to show them that I am in total control of the office, not you. And that was something I'd never get across if I didn't shout at you every day. In reality Drake, I respect you. You get great results, you don't whinge too much, and on top of that, you got a cracking pair of tits. Keep that up. You may just make DCI one day. But you need to get that 'personal problem' sorted out, because your work is suffering, Drake. Everyone's noticed. At lunch, I want you to get that bloody bacon, get your issue sorted, and then come back here with a clear head. Do you understand?"

"I don't think it can..."

"I asked if you understood, Drake," Dannell said, talking over her.

"Yes, sir," she mumbled.

"Good. Go finish your paperwork. I'll talk to you this afternoon."

Alex sighed and nodded. Today was going to be a bloody long day. That was certain.

~(*)~

Gene loked at the clock, his eyes narrow. It was nearly two, and Alex still hadn't gotten home. She usually took lunch between twelve and twelve thirty. The latest she had ever arrived was one fifteen, and she had rung him apologising before that.

The phone rang, but Gene waited to answer. He and Alex had devised a system for when she rang. After two rings, she would hang up and then ring back immediately. This time, however, the phone kept ringing, so Gene ignored it. He scratched his beard, which he had kept after getting out of captivity. He had cleaned it up significantly, and it was kept close to his face. His hair remained down to his shoulders. Gene figured that this way, if anyone happened to glance into Alex's window and see him, it wouldn't be as evident who he was.

Gene jumped as someone knocked at the door.

"_Drake!"_ a man called from outside the door. _"Just because I was nice to you earlier doesn't mean you get a two hour lunch!"_

A two hour lunch? That meant that Alex would have left at noon. It didn't take two hours to get bacon. There was a shop just down the street.

The man continued to pound at the door. Gene panicked. For an entire month, he had managed to keep his survival a secret. He wasn't ready yet to reveal himself. However, Alex might be in danger. What was more important? Was it keeping himself secret or keeping her alive?

The answer, of course, was obvious.

"_Drake, I swear to God I will break this door down!"_

Gene walked to the door and opened it, coming face to face with a short, black haired, red faced, angry man.

"Where's Drake?" the man asked.

"She never came home. She was supposed to bring bacon over lunch."

"It doesn't take two hours to get bacon."

"I think she's in danger," Gene said seriously.

The man simply squinted at him. "I didn't know Drake associated with hippies."

"Did you hear me?" Gene asked forcefully. "I think she's in danger!"

"What makes you think that?" the man said, scoffing.

"Because when I was captive, I heard them talking about her, too."

"When you were captive...wait. Who are you exactly?"

"I'm the furthest thing from a hippy you can find. I'm former DCI Gene Hunt. And I think I know who took your DI."


	4. Chapter 4

**Ahh, this chapter was so much easier to write! Ugh, you should see my Doc Manager titles in here. They're fantastic. A brilliant snapshot into the writing of this fic. I think I might post them on my tumblr later.**

**Chapter 4**

Alex sat calmly in the chair as the men tied her to it. She wanted to fight them off, but there was a gun to the base of her skull. Alex also wanted to cry, as the calm she was radiating was only a show for the men who had kidnapped her. Inwardly, she was panicking, but she wasn't going to give them the reaction they wanted. Better they think her unaffected than to think her terrified.

The men were silent as they tied the ropes around her arms. She had to admit, she was stunned at one of the men. She had worked with him every single day. She had trusted him with her life. So had Gene. And he had tried to kill Gene. God only knew what he was going to do to her.

"She may be a bit more fun than Hunt," one of the men said finally. He had long brown hair and dark blue eyes that were staring at Alex in clear lust. "Be nice to have a woman around again."

"You're not an animal, Nigel," said the man who was pressing a barrel to her head. She had gotten a glimpse of him. He was clearly the leader of the group, with grey hair and a beard, and carried an air of authority with him. "Show our guest more respect than that. She's not on the receiving end of any of your instincts."

Alex sighed inwardly with relief. They may torture and kill her, but she had one less thing to worry about. As the three other men finished tying her limbs to the chair, the man pulled the gun down from her neck and walked in front of her, he squatted, staring up at her with a pleased and pleasant expression.

"So, Alex, I take it you know who we are?" he asked her conversationally.

"Piss off," she replied, knowing that he may shoot her then and there, but she wasn't going to let him intimidate her. She shifted uncomfortably in the chair. The back had been sawed off halfway up, and she was unable to lean against it without it pressing uncomfortably into her spine.

"Now, Alex, you really ought to be nicer to me," the man said, standing to his full height of over six feet. "I'm the one who protects you from _him._" He motioned to the brown haired man, who stepped forward with a look of glee on his face. The man took the gun from the grey-haired man's hand, and walked closer to her. She stared straight into his eyes, glaring at him, until his arm whipped around and the butt of the pistol hit her in the face. She tried not to cry out, but couldn't help but let out a gasp of pain. She tried to reach up to feel her face, but the ropes tied around her arms prevented it. Alex felt blood dripping off of her chin. She looked back up at the man, who had tucked the gun into the back of his jeans. He merely smirked at her, putting his foot under one of the rungs on the chair.

Alex let out a short shout of surprise as she suddenly fell backwards to the ground. She tried to keep her head up, but it slammed against the floor all the same. Bright lights exploded in front of her eyes before they faded and left her with a darkened version of the room that was slowly growing darker.

The grey-haired man's face appeared above her. "Don't make me angry, Alex. I can kill you just as easily as I killed Gene."

Alex wanted to reply, wanted to laugh in his face, but she couldn't move. She must have still been stunned from her head hitting the floor. The room was slowly fading to black, but she laughed inside her mind at him.

_He's not dead,_ she thought. _He's alive._

The man's face above her frowned, looking concerned, before everything went cold and she finally succumbed to the darkness.

Suddenly there was the smell of something awful filling her nose, and Alex jerked awake. She was still lying on the floor, tied to the chair. The back of her head and her back were throbbing in unison with her cheek. She could feel blood flowing down her face, dripping into her ear.

"Hunt's alive?" the grey-haired man asked as soon as her eyes opened. "You said that Hunt's alive. Where is he?"

_Shit. _She must have murmured it out loud as she fell into unconsciousness. Alex had thought that she couldn't speak, but she must have been able to. And now she had given away Gene's biggest secret.

The grey-haired man slapped her across the face. _"_WHERE IS HE?!" he roared.

Alex spat in his face. She wasn't going to reveal anything to him. Gene had been through this hellhole once. She wasn't going to put him through it again.

"Untie her," the man said softly, wiping her spittle from his cheek. The man named Nigel rushed forward to comply, along with another man she knew from sight from a different station. The fourth man, the one from her station, was nowhere to be seen. Nigel pulled out a knife and slit the ropes around her wrists while the other man untied her ankles. Once she was free, the grey haired man put the gun against her head.

"You don't fight," he said. "If you do, I kill you. Now get off the chair and stand up."

Alex complied, staring the man in the eyes, refusing to show any fear. She was going to get out of here alive, and soon.

The man laughed, walking to a chair and sitting backwards on it. "Nigel, Jack, look at the fight in this one. She reminds me of Hunt."

"His fight ended quickly, though," Jack said.

"Once we threatened to kill this one," Nigel said, still staring at her with a dangerous look in his eye.

"He still fought," said the grey-haired man. "Just not as loudly."

"He stopped in the end," Nigel said.

"After you nearly killed him," Jack retorted.

"You three helped!" Nigel said defensively.

"Enough!" the grey-haired man shouted. "Nigel. Persuade Miss Drake to speak to us." The man relaxed the grip on his gun and stared at Alex, smiling humourlessly. "Once she tells us where Gene Hunt is, we will stop."

Alex continued to stare at the man until an elbow hit her in the back. He caught her as she started to fall, moving to her front and driving a knee up into her stomach. Nigel let go then, letting her fall to the floor.

"Where is Gene Hunt?" the grey-haired man asked.

"Fuck you," she responded, coughing, trying to get air.

"If only," the grey-haired man said, nodding at Nigel to continue.

After what seemed like hours, the grey-haired man motioned for Nigel to stop. Alex lay on the ground, bruised and bleeding. Tears of pain watered in the corners of her eyes, one of which was nearly swollen shut. She was proud, however. She had not given up where Gene was.

"You're a very loyal person, Alex," the grey-haired man said, walking over to her. "And very brave as well. But you know what they say about bravery, right? I can tell you don't lack intelligence, but all this false bravado... you're being stupid Alex, and I think you know that. Just tell us where Gene is, and Nigel will leave you alone." His tone was pleading, gently persuading. She wanted Nigel to leave her alone, but she couldn't give up more of Gene's secrets than she already had.

"I'm good at keeping secrets," she said, her words thick around the blood in her mouth. "One of your men works in our office. How is it that you didn't know that he was back? You tried to kill him a month ago. You've believed him dead since."

"Shut up!" Nigel said, kicking her in the stomach.

"Nigel," the grey-haired man said calmly.

"Sorry, Tom," Nigel replied, backing away from her. He sat down on another chair in the room, so that the three of them were in a triangle around her. The chair that she had been tied to had been moved to the side at some point, and she lay in the middle of the floor.

"Gene's been living with you," Tom said softly, staring at her.

Alex said nothing, staring at him through her one good eye. Blood was still trickling from her nose, and it hurt to take every breath. She estimated that she had a few broken ribs, a possible broken nose, and a sprain in a few of her fingers.

Tom stared at her for a moment longer before motioning to Jack. Jack stood, pulling something out of his jacket pocket. He knelt down next to Alex. She heard the flick of a knife and felt cold, sharp metal against her neck. She didn't shudder, didn't gasp. Alex merely stared at Tom out of one eye as he waited for her to crack.

"Do you realise that Jack could kill you right now?" he asked quietly.

"I got the picture when he put a blade against my throat," she responded. "Before that, it was all a bit foggy."

"I'm tired of your lip, Alexandra. Tell me. Is Gene living with you?"

Jack's blade pressed a little harder against her neck.

"I have no idea where Gene is at the moment." It wasn't a lie. Had he figured out that she was missing yet? Or was he still waiting in the flat for her to come home with bacon? Surely he had figured it out. Surely he was able to look for her.

Of course, he wasn't the same Gene that she had once known. Would that make any difference? Would he still spring into action if something was wrong? Or was he going to sit in her flat and plot on how best to take down the four men that had kidnapped him, and now her?

_Gene won't do that_, she thought to herself, certain this time that she had not spoken aloud.

Tom flicked his wrist and the blade disappeared from Alex's neck. "Fine, Alex. You won't tell me where he is, but tell me this. How did he survive?"

Alex sat up, ignoring the shooting pain her ribs were sending through her torso, and shrugged. "He swam."

"He was tied up when we threw him in the Thames."

"He didn't discuss anything with me. He wouldn't talk about it."

"Are you sure about that Alex? He wouldn't say _anything?"_

"He wouldn't talk about it," she repeated firmly.

Tom stared at her haughtily, judging every single word, weighing it in his mind. Finally, he stood and walked over to her. The man knelt down next to her. He pushed a lock of hair behind her ear, staring deep into her eyes before he spoke in a quiet, almost whispered tone.

"You don't have to worry, Alex. Before you leave us, we will see to it that everything that happened to Gene happened to you. We'll make certain of one thing though. We won't screw up the ending. By the time you go into the Thames, you'll already be dead. I'm going to have some tea. You enjoy chewing on that thought for a while. Ta."

Tom motioned to the other two men and they followed him out of the room. The door slammed behind them, and Alex heard the clicking of a lock. She had given away that Gene was alive. They were going to go after him. The past month had all been for nothing. Soon, they'd find and capture him, and they'd finish the job they started.

Alex stood, ignoring the pain in her ribs and walked over to the window. How was she going to get out of this? Even if she broke the window, there was nothing beneath to climb onto. She was high up in the building. There was no way to get out without killing herself in a fall.

She sighed, resting her head against the window. There had to be a way out of here. And she had to find the way out before they found Gene. Otherwise, they would both be dead.

An hour later according to her watch, she was sitting back on the floor, staring out the window that now contained a blood print from pressing her head against it. Alex was still trying to figure out a way out when she heard the lock on the door click. She turned to face it, grimacing from the pain in her ribs. The man named Jack walked in, closing the door behind him and staring at her evenly.

"I'm here to check your injuries," he said calmly, pushing back his raven black hair. "I'm the doctor at Fenchurch West now, you know."

"I thought I had seen you around my station," Alex said, not quite trusting him near her yet.

The man grinned. "We all were at your station once. "Me, Tom, Nigel...course, you worked with Charlie. Stay still!"

Alex continued to back away from him, scooting along the wooden floor. "Why did you leave?"

"They outed Tom. He wouldn't join the Mason bullshit that was going on. Nigel, Charlie and I stayed on, to see what the new DCI would be like. God dammit woman, stay still!" He grabbed her by the wrist, dragging her across the room to where a heavy wardrobe sat. He pushed her down to the floor, sitting on her chest, sending waves of pain shooting through her torso as she struggled. After a few seconds, cold metal encased her wrist, connecting her to the leg of the wardrobe.

"Lie still now," he said. "I'm checking you for bloody injuries, not trying to make them worse!"

Alex spat at him, slapping him in the face for good measure. He merely sighed, grabbing her other wrist. He unlocked the cuff around the leg of the wardrobe and pulled it out to cuff her other wrist, the chain now wrapping around the leg.

"Are you going to make me tie your sodding legs together too?" he asked, irritated.

Alex glared at him, but finally lay still, allowing him to poke and prod at her injuries. "Why do you even care if I'm injured or not?" she asked through gritted teeth as he pushed down on her stomach.

"Can't have you dying of internal injuries when we're supposed to be spending the next eleven months together, can we?" he said, smiling widely at her.

"What did I even do to you? What did _Gene_ do to you?"

"Gene had Nigel demoted. Nigel couldn't take being a DS, he left. That's when you came in, and I transferred. Charlie stayed. We always knew we wanted to get Gene, and then Nigel decided that we ought to get you too. And hell, we thought we'd make it memorable. Don't you realise what today is?"

"January 26th," she breathed.

"One year to the day that Gene Hunt went missing. And now, maybe we get to kill him on the same day." He gave her another, wide, toothy smile. "You don't have any bad injuries. A few fractured ribs, but no internal bleeding. I'll come back and check on you a little later. If you can, lay on the side of your fractured ribs. It'll help you breathe deeper and prevent pneumonia."

With that, he stood and walked back out of the room, leaving her handcuffed to the wardrobe. Alex heard the lock slide in the door and closed her eyes, letting out only a small breath her ribs would allow her to manage.

They planned to kill Gene. That day. And she was handcuffed to a wardrobe, incapable of doing anything about it.

**Okay, you know that had to happen at SOME point...but hey! She's fighting, right?**

**I'm working on chapter 5 right now so hopefully that will be up at some point next week.**

**Also, I don't know if any of you were reading 'The Lies of Family' on fictionpress, but that story has been put on permanent hiatus as of Wednesday last week. Mark, Zach, and Clark all pretty much decided that because their stories are thought out and planned, that they don't actually need to be written. So until I can get permission from those three bastards to continue, the story shall stay on hiatus.**

**Ta!**


	5. Chapter 5

**Chapter 5**

Gene followed Dannell down the stairs from Alex's flat, not stopping to shave or even put on better clothes. He was extremely worried about Alex, but in the back of his mind, there was still some concern over his pride. How would the men react to seeing this weaker, bearded version of him? Or would they just be happy to see him alive?

These thoughts plagued him as he walked into the station and up to CID, but no one seemed to notice him.

_They don't recognise me anymore,_ he thought to himself. He realised that he had an anonymity that he had never experienced in the station before. Even when he had started, by the end of the day, every lowly PC had known his name. But now, everyone thought he was dead. He was no one noteworthy, just a member of the public, brought in by the new DCI. Even as they passed Viv, the sergeant barely glanced up.

_I'm no one._

The thought stuck with Gene, made him realise how low those four men actually brought him in twelve months. Now, it was time for that to change. He had to be the Manc Lion once more. He had to save Alex.

Dannell walked through the doors of CID and the familiar scents hit Gene like a wall. There was the overwhelming smell of fag smoke, combined with the scent of sweat. Underneath that all were faint traces of perfume, no doubt sprayed by Shaz or Alex at some point. Alex's desk was empty at the moment, but there were files laid out over it, showing that she intended to return. Only one other desk in the office was empty, a sight which had Gene angry, and to his shame, somewhat fearful.

"That's not Drake," one of the men called out as they walked in.

"Unless she's gotten the ability to grow a full beard in two hours," Ray sniggered.

"Mary Magdalene," Shaz said, staring at Gene and dropping the files she was carrying. After the files crashed to the floor, silence started to fall over the room, one desk at a time. Men ended their calls immediately, pens dropped to the floor, cigarettes were left forgotten in ashtrays.

"Guv?" Ray asked, his cigarette still in hand with a column of ash attached to the end. His voice was hushed, almost afraid that the sight before his eyes wasn't actually true.

Gene had no idea what to say. What was there to say when you had been missing for a year, and believed dead for nearly as long?

CID was totally frozen. Even Dannell, unfamiliar with Gene, recognised how revered the Guv had once been. Finally, Bammo broke the silence that had stretched since Ray's whispered word.

"You're alive."

Gene nodded once, knowing that the whole room could sense his uncertainty.

"What happened to you?" one of the other men asked.

"Four against one. Even I had trouble with those odds. I tried getting out, but then they nearly killed me. They decided to do it on purpose and threw me into the Thames, but I got free. Now they've taken Alex."

A hushed murmur fell over the room.

"Who are they?" Dannell asked.

"Four men who used to work here. They have grudges against Alex and I for taking their spots. I got one demoted and he left soon after. Their names are Tom Blackwood, Nigel Bloodworth, Jack Romilly, and Charlie...Charlie Poirot."

The room gasped as one. Everyone recognised the names. They had all worked with the men. They had all trusted their lives to them. For Bammo, the news had struck the hardest, as Poirot had been his partner.

Dannell stared across the room. "We can't take this case."

"Sir!" Ray protested immediately. Gene felt a sense of smug satisfaction. Dannell may be their new DCI, but he wasn't their Guv. He was 'Sir'. Gene had been 'Guv' from day one.

"Carling! Everyone in this office has worked with those four and the missing officer is one of your own. You are _all_ too close to the case. Everyone's judgement is impaired. Look! This is your Guv, here. These men kept him hidden from you for a year. I'm safe to assume they tortured you, right, Gene?" Gene nodded once.

"How many of you are angry? How many of you want revenge? I'm ringing Fenchurch West, and they are going to take over for us." He spoke the final sentence in a tone that wouldn't let anyone argue, and walked back into his office, leaving everyone to stare at Gene.

"How long have you been free?" Ray asked.

Gene shook his head. "I don't want to talk about it, Ray."

Ray looked at him, and Gene knew that he wanted to say more. However, after a fixed glare, Ray silenced himself, although the rest of the room continued to stare. He wasn't sure what to do. He knew that they could feel his uncertainty. And he knew that they were losing respect for him with every single second he stood there motionless. He was weak and useless. He wasn't the Guv anymore. He was a victim, and victims were shit.

"Do you want a ciggie?" Chris asked, breaking the silence once more. They were just as uncertain as he was. To them, Gene not screaming as soon as he walked in was something extremely strange. And for him to have come back from the dead...

"I don't smoke anymore," he replied. He didn't touch alcohol or fags. He had withdrawn from both at the same time when he was stuck in that hellhole, and it was not something he was eager to do again.

"What's with the beard?" one of the constables asked.

"I didn't get very many haircut opportunities," he snapped, but not viciously. "I cleaned it up when I got to Alex's flat but otherwise –"

"You've been staying at Alex's?" Ray asked, surprised.

Gene nodded. "When I got out of the Thames, it was the first place I thought of going."

"Why not the station?" asked Chris.

"I'd just turn up in front of Poirot, would I? He thought he had killed me! Probably would have organised a hit right there before I got more than three words out of my mouth. Besides, I knew Bolly would help me outright."

"How long has she known?" Ray asked, looking betrayed.

"Not long enough for you to get your knickers in a twist, Ray. I swore her to secrecy, and Alex keeps secrets well."

Ray finally flicked his cigarette ash into the ashtray. It was a gesture of irritation, but understanding. Alex was ridiculously good at keeping secrets; it was well known throughout the office.

"Don't be mad that I went to her instead of you, Carling," Gene said, feeling ridiculous for even having to say that. "You know you'd have blabbed it all over the office, and I couldn't have Poirot know."

Ray opened his mouth to protest, but at that moment, Dannell walked out of his office. "Hunt, can you come with me to an interview room? West will be over in a little while to take the case, but they want me to go ahead and interview you."

Gene nodded once. "Interview one?"

"Yes, let's go."

Gene walked out of the office, straight into the interview room without looking at anyone.

"I'm going to grab a PC, and then I'll be in. Make yourself comfortable," Dannell said, ever the professional.

Gene nodded once, and walked into the interview room, settling down at the opposite side of the table he was used to. He remembered the last time he was on this side of the table, back in the seventies. Back then, Sam had been interviewing him. He had been a suspect in a murder investigation. And at that moment in time, he had thought he was guilty. And now...he was even more useless than he had been back then.

Gene was distracted from his thoughts as the door opened. It shut quickly. Poirot was standing right across from him.

"So, you're alive," Poirot said, putting his hand in his jacket pocket. "We thought we killed you."

"Maybe you did," Gene shot back. "Maybe I'm just a ghost now." He felt fear starting to curl in his stomach, but tried to push it away. Poirot had never beaten him when the others weren't around. Sometimes, he had seemed remorseful for what he did. Maybe he could reason with the man.

"Then you should stop haunting us," Poirot said, pulling out a gun. He put a silencer on the end. "You should have died a month ago, you know that, right?"

"I assumed that by you throwing me in the Thames all tied up."

"Then why did you live?"

"Funny thing about drowning. Makes you want to swim."

Poirot just stared at him. Gene was starting to sweat slightly. He really was nervous, even though he wasn't showing the fear. He couldn't let them win.

"Where's Alex, you bastard?"

Poirot grinned. "She's spending some time with Nigel. When I left, Jack went to check her injuries to see if she was able to continue."

Gene clenched his teeth together. "You let her go!"

"It doesn't matter what we do to her, Gene," Poirot said. "You'll be dead in a minute anyway."

"You won't get out though," Gene said, starting to accept his fate and realising there was no point in fighting. "I named you, Poirot. They will go after you. You'll spend the rest of your life in jail."

"Least I won't be dead."

"You'll wish you were once you've dropped the soap."

"There's no more time for your games!" Poirot yelled. "I'm done with your shit Gene Hunt!"

"Then just end it," Gene said, his voice deep and raw. The only thing he cared about was Alex, and he couldn't even help her. Maybe it would just be better for him to exit the world. He was useless anyway. He had spent eleven months their prisoner. If he couldn't get himself out, how in the world would he get Alex out? It was all useless in the end.

Gene stretched his arms out wide, opening his chest up to Poirot's inevitable shot.

"Go ahead," Gene said when Poirot didn't shoot. "I'm nothing anymore. I'm not the Manc Lion. I'm not the Guv. I'm hardly even a man. You took that all away from me. What's the point anymore when my whole CID can't respect me? All they do is pity me. And what kind of life is that?"

"Don't tempt me," Poirot said, his hand shaking.

The door opened suddenly, Dannell and a PC standing outside with looks of shock on their faces. "Poirot," Dannell breathed.

"Don't get any closer!" Poirot yelled.

"Can't shoot under pressure?" Gene asked softly. "No wonder you were such a shit copper."

There were suddenly two points of pain radiating through his torso. One was in the stomach, one the shoulder. Neither felt serious, but it was enough to wind him and make him stumble to the floor in pain.

"I'm not joking around!" Poirot yelled, pointing the gun at Dannell and the PC now. It was as though he had lost all control. He knew he was going to prison, so now he didn't care.

_Death by copper,_ Gene thought, remembering Alex's words. _Alex._ He had to fight for Alex. He had almost given up, but she still needed him.

"_WHERE IS SHE?!" _he roared suddenly. Pain forgotten, he stood and strode over to Poirot, ignoring other shots that were fired at him. He knocked the gun out of Poirot's hands, backing him up against the wall and holding his throat. "Where is she?" Gene hissed.

"Gene! Let him go!" Dannell yelled, but the words were lost on him. For this moment, he was a DCI again. He was a Lion. He was strong.

"TELL ME!"

Poirot was starting to turn blue. He was gasping for air, but Gene just held tighter. "Where. Is. She."

"Talfourd Road," he choked. "Red door." Gene let him go and he dropped to the ground, clutching his throat as the PC rushed forward to arrest the man.

"Gene," Dannell said slowly. "You need to get to hospital now."

Gene looked at the man, realising the pain in his chest. It was much more than the initial two bullets in him now. Pain covered his entire chest, and he counted five bullet holes there, along with one in his leg. He staggered backwards, feeling every piece of lead in his body.

"Carling!" Dannell yelled, but there was no need. CID had come running when they heard Poirot and Gene yelling.

"C'mon Guv," Ray said, draping Gene's arm around him. "We'll put the lights on, and we can fly there."

"You've got to save her," Gene said to Dannell as they staggered out. "You've got to save Alex."

"We'll save her," Dannell said. "I promise you. We will save her."


	6. Chapter 6

**Soooooooooooo...forgot to update last week...oops! It was busy though! My final year of college is back in full swing and I figure I should focus on my ICU nursing rather than writing... I've got lives to save! (Unfortunately, none of them Alex's...I guess it's fortunate for her that I'm NOT in the ICU where she would be, hmm? :D )**

**Chapter 6**

Gene woke slowly, his eyes feeling extremely heavy. The last time that he had this much trouble waking up was when they had nearly killed him. This time, he knew, he was safe. Alex would be safe. They would have rescued her by now.

Finally, he was able to open his eyes, surprised to see Ray sitting next to him. He supposed that Ray had just stayed in hospital when they had wheeled him back to surgery. Gene wanted to speak, but at the moment, the ability to do so escaped him. Whatever was in that bloody anaesthetic was extremely annoying.

He looked around, studying the tubes that were connected to him. There was a bag of blood on one side, so he must have lost quite a lot. Another bag of clear liquid ran into his other arm. He had a blood pressure cuff on that arm as well, and he could feel a heart monitor attached to his chest.

"You're awake," Ray said, his voice carefully calm.

"How is she?" Gene asked, silently celebrating that he didn't have to stumble around for words for several minutes.

Ray looked at him for a moment. He knew that look. There was something bad going on.

"What happened?" he asked.

"Poirot lied," Ray said quietly. "There was no house with a red door on Talfourd Road. And then, Bammo went to take him down to the cells. For closure, you know? Poor bastard. Anyway, Poirot took Bammo's gun and...and...Well, he shot himself. Poirot's dead, and Alex is still missing."

Gene didn't know what to say. He hadn't anticipated this. He didn't think that Poirot would lie. Now Alex was missing without any leads whatsoever, and he was even more useless, if that were possible. He could hardly walk when he came into A&E, and now he had no idea what kind of drugs were in his system.

_Just leave,_ a small part of him said. _Sod this place. It's for poofs and wankers._

"Fenchurch West has taken over Alex's case," Ray continued, when Gene didn't say anything. They're hunting for her now as we speak. And the three other men have their names and photos being shown all over the telly. They're not going to get away with it, Guv."

"They may not," Gene said quietly. "We just have to hope that we catch them before they kill her."

"We will, Guv," Ray said, trying to reassure the man.

Gene just gave a small, fake smile. "Sure."

~(*)~

Alex lay on the small bed they had provided for her. It was old and uncomfortable, but it was preferable to lying on the floor. The window across from her still had the bloodstain there from the first day, when she had put her head against it. Those wounds had long healed though, and she had been able to see out of both eyes for a time before the men came back to make the other swell.

Ten weeks had passed. She had no idea if Gene was dead or alive, but she had realised that Poirot had stopped coming in. He had only appeared on day one. Had he been captured? If he had, he must not have sold out the other three.

She still hadn't worked out a way to escape. The only thing she hadn't tried was breaking the window and making a flying leap. She knew though, that she was too high in the air to survive a fall like that. That was the one thing she was determined about though. She was going to survive. No matter what, she would make it through this torture.

Alex heard steps from outside her room and closed her eyes. It was best just to pretend she was asleep when any of the men came in. Sometimes they would leave her alone that way. If her eyes were open, they never would.

The door opened and someone walked in. She focused on evening her breathing, making it appear as though she really was asleep. However, luck was not on her side.

"Wake up!" Nigel said with a kick to her stomach. Alex grunted, her eyes flying open. It was going to be a beating then. She had long ago figured out what man meant what. Jack was usually food, or to check her injuries. Tom was all talk and laughter, always mocking. And Nigel...Nigel was there to prevent her from getting Stockholm Syndrome.

"Good morning, sunshine," the man said sarcastically. Alex said nothing, debating about whether or not to fight. They had tried to break her of that. Sometimes, they won, and she wouldn't resist. Usually, it was when she was too weak or tired to do anything else. Other times though, she fought as hard as she could. She even fought back against Nigel once, landing a blow that had made his nose crack satisfyingly underneath the palm of her hand. She had laughed then, as bright red blood started spurting out of his nose. Nigel had left the room, slamming the door behind him, and a few minutes later, Jack had come in to finish what the other man had started. The more she fought, the more they made her suffer, but she was not going to give in. She was stronger than that, and she would not become the weak little woman they wanted her to be.

Alex sat up on the mattress and glared at Nigel. "What do you want?" she asked.

"The usual. But I can't have that now, can I?" His eyes roved her body, leaving a clear picture in her mind as to what he wanted. He had made that obvious from day one, but luckily he was so loyal to Tom that she never had to worry about him doing anything.

"No, so why are you here?" She had made up her mind. She was going to fight today. She hated Nigel so much. She hated the way he smiled at her when his teeth and face were flecked with her blood. She hated how he smoothed his hair back before and after a beating, and how he treated her like she was nothing. No, today, she was going to fight and show him how deep her hatred ran.

"Why do you think?" he asked, his fist flying up. Alex ducked to avoid it, throwing a knee into his groin. He dropped to the floor, and she kicked him in the stomach, knowing that the blow wouldn't be as effective without her shoes. Nigel grabbed her foot, pulling her to the ground. Alex hit hard, landing on her arm. He was breathing heavily and she could tell that he was starting to regain his composure. Before he could totally gain it back, she tried to wriggle out of his grip, but Nigel held on strong. She was unsure of what to do next. With as much power as she could muster, Alex punched Nigel's temple. He collapsed to the floor, his breathing evening out. Alex pulled her foot out of his grasp, stunned. Even though she had fought before, she had never knocked him out.

Alex stared at the man. He was twisted oddly, one shoulder on the floor and his bum in the air. She smiled grimly at the scene. She had defeated him. When he woke up, she knew, she would be in a lot of trouble.

It was about that moment when Alex realised that the door was still open. Hardly daring to breathe, she walked out of the room she had been kept captive in for weeks. She was in a flat, but it seemed as though it served no other purpose than to keep her hostage in the bedroom. The walls were bare and there was no furniture in it, save for one couch and a television. The chairs that they liked to sit in sometimes were in there as well.

Hardly daring to hope, Alex decided to try the front door of the flat. She exhaled a breath she didn't realise she was holding when it swung open easily. Surely it shouldn't be this easy? Alex decided not to question the simplicity of her escape and ran down the hall, looking for a staircase. She found one and took the stairs nearly half a flight at a time until she reached the ground floor. She stepped outside into the sunshine and breathed in her first breath of fresh air in over two months. It was glorious. However, she didn't pause too long to enjoy it. Any second now, they could be after her. She looked at the building she had been held captive in for months, staring at the exterior of the building until she was certain she had it in her mind.

Alex started running then, only taking a moment to glance at street signs and figure out what street she was actually on. She needed to get to the police station, but she wasn't entirely sure where she was.

_Find a main road,_ she thought. _Then you can figure out where to go._

Alex kept running, getting odd looks from people walking in the street. She realised that she probably looked like a crazed homeless person, but she didn't care. She had to get to Fenchurch. She had to get back to Gene. That is, if Gene was even alive.

No. She couldn't let herself think like that. If Gene was dead, then what had she been fighting for for the past ten weeks? Every time she had thought about giving up, she thought about him. If he was dead, then all of her fighting was useless. She might as well have let them kill her.

_Stop thinking like that! _Alex admonished herself, running right into a PC.

"Steady on love," the man said, straightening his helmet. He looked at her again, and the blood drained from his face.

"You're that Inspector."

"Drake. Alex Drake," she said, panting. "I need to get to Fenchurch East. Now."

The man nodded dumbly, reaching into his pocket for a radio. "775 to Alpha One Control."

"_Alpha One Control. What's your status 775?"_

"I've found Detective Inspector Alex Drake from Fenchurch East. Requesting squad car to take her there."

There was silence for a moment before the person on the other end spoke again, his voice in clear disbelief.

"_You've found DI Drake?"_

"Yes."

"_Are you sure it's her?"_

"Oh Jesus Christ," Alex said, grabbing the radio from him. "Alpha One Control, this is Detective Inspector Alex Drake. We're on the corner of Black Prince and Kennington Roads. If you do not send a car _now,_ if not bloody sooner, I swear to God I will have DS Ray Carling come over and kick your sorry arse into tomorrow. Do not mess with me. I have been in hell for the past ten weeks and do not need you pathetic shits to make things any more difficult."

There was silence on the other end again, but when the man spoke again, his voice was nervous, rather than disbelieving.

"_Right away, Ma'am. The car is on its way."_

Only a few minutes later, she heard sirens in the distance. Just a few seconds after that, a car screeched to a halt in front of them, the driver looking completely gobsmacked. He got out of the car, nodding in a hello. "DI Drake, if you come with me, I'll take you to Fenchurch East. PC Logan, please come with us."

The both clambered into the car, and the man took off, sirens wailing. Alex noticed that he could not stop looking at her.

"They didn't think you'd come back," the man said. "After Hunt was missing for a year... they thought you'd be gone just as long, or if you weren't, it'd be your body that turned up. No one expected you back alive."

Alex clenched her jaw against his words, but finally swallowed her anger long enough to ask a question. "You mentioned Gene Hunt. How is he?"

The man shrugged. "Dunno. Last I heard, the bent man from his office...er...Poirot I think...had shot him. He was on his way to hospital. I didn't hear nothing after that."

"You don't know if he's alive or not?"

"No. Poirot isn't. I know that. Shot himself. Right in the head."

That explained why she hadn't seen Poirot since day one. He hadn't been captured. He was dead. Alex felt slight relief. There was one less man to worry about.

However, her thoughts quickly returned to Gene. How was he? Had he survived? What if they had managed to remove the bullet successfully only for him to die later? Surely the copper driving the car would know if Gene had died, though. Wouldn't he?

A few agonising minutes later, they pulled up in front of Fenchurch East. Alex practically jumped out of the car, running up the stairs, ready to head to CID. However, she was stopped by a barrage of people just inside the door. There were uniforms everywhere, along with several members of CID, and a few people she didn't know. She recognised the station doctor as well. Alex searched the crowd for that one face in particular. After a few moments of searching, she spotted him, standing away from the crowd, a worried and sorrowful expression on his face. His hair had been cut short again, and his face was beardless. Gene looked like he had actually lost some of the weight he had gained during the month that they had lived together. Happy but concerned, Alex started towards him.

"You look like you've been through the wars, Alex," the doctor said, ambushing her and looking concerned. He grabbed her wrist, dragging her toward his office, not even noticing that she was resisting. "C'mon. We need to make sure you don't have any long lasting injuries, and I want to do some blood work."

They reached his office and he shut the door promptly, leaving the crowd of people, and Gene, behind.

**If anyone can please figure out why I'm being so nice to Alex, let me know...I still haven't worked that out quite yet.**


	7. Chapter 7

**Chapter 7**

Gene watched as Alex got pulled away pulled away by the station doctor, but made no attempt to follow. In ten weeks, she had done the impossible. She had escaped from the men. This made him seem even more pathetic than before Oh, sure, he had had a surge of the Lion after she went missing, but when week after week had passed without finding her, he had gone back into his shell. The thought of what they might be doing to her was constantly in his head, and he knew that if they didn't find her soon, the next time she would be seen would be on a morgue cart. But here she was. She had defied the odds, and now, she was free.

The crowd dispersed, everyone content with the fact that they had seen the lost DI return alive. The men from Fenchurch West, however, hovered. They were waiting to interview her. All had grim expressions on their faces. To Gene, it wasn't very surprising. They had heard his account of the eleven months in hell, and everyone knew Alex's account wouldn't be any better.

"You okay?" Gene hadn't realised that Ray was standing next to him. He supposed he should have; the air was always thick with smoke whenever Ray was close by.

"Do you really have to ask me that?" Gene responded, staring at the closed door of the doctor's office. Ray had stepped up after Alex disappeared to 'take care of him' ash Shaz put it. In reality, all Ray ever really did was sit and smoke, but at the same time, Gene appreciated the company. They had never had the heart-wrenching conversations one would have in the films, but if they did one day, something would be extremely wrong. Gene didn't do feelings, and neither did Ray. He may be pathetic and useless, but he wasn't a poof.

The doctor's door opened, and Alex walked out, looking somewhat annoyed. He knew she hated doctors, but just by looking at her, he could tell she needed one. Both eyes were black, and one was swollen so much her eye was barely open. Her nose was slightly crooked, and her cheek was bruised and cut. There was still some dried blood on her face. He could see some matted into her hair as well. Her clothes were torn and dirty, stained with blood and sweat. Alex's feet were bare.

As soon as she saw him, Alex walked over to Gene, ignoring the men from Fenchurch West trying to intercept her. She stared at Gene for a long moment, looking at him in amazement. "You're alive," she said, reaching up to touch his clean-shaven face. "They were going to kill you. I didn't know –"

"They didn't." His short and curt response made her back away in surprise. He knew he should be rejoicing that she was okay. Part of him was, but there was another part that resented her. Why could she succeed where he had failed? He had always had to save her in the past, and now, when he couldn't, she had managed anyway. She was stronger than he was. He may as well cut off his bollocks and give them to her. She certainly deserved them more than he did.

However, at her hurt expression, he felt guilty for all the negative thoughts that he was having toward her. She hadn't asked to be kidnapped. She certainly hadn't asked to be tortured by those men. And she was able to escape. Shouldn't he be proud of her for that?

"What'd the doc say?" he asked her, taking on a kinder tone.

"Lots of bruising. Some sprains. I might have had a broken nose at one point. No internal bleeding, as far as he could tell. He recommended me to go to hospital, just to make sure that nothing needs to be treated." The tone of her voice made it clear what she thought of that idea.

"I'll take you there after you talk to the blokes from Fenchurch West. If the doc doesn't think there is anything critical, we'll just get your interview out of the way."

"I don't want to go there." Alex had a stubborn pout on her face, and Gene knew that she was going to fight him about this. Her whole expression had darkened and she crossed her arms in front of her chest.

"Tough tits," Gene said firmly. "You're going."

"I didn't make you go after you got free! And you were in much worse shape than I am now."

Gene stared at her for a moment. "You weren't trying to keep yourself secret, were you? I heard about that radio call." He felt the corner of his mouth twitching, but managed to keep a straight face.

Alex looked down at the ground guiltily. "I just wanted to get back here. To get away from the flat."

Gene finally allowed himself to give her a small smile. She looked so fragile, so broken, but still, he could see the fight in her stance. There was still fire in her eyes. Had he had that much fight left at ten weeks? No, he realised. Week seven was when they threatened to kill Alex. Week nine, they had threatened to make him watch as they killed her. Although he had scaled back his fight a bit in week seven, it dropped exponentially in week nine. He still hadn't given up fighting back, but did it less frequently. And then, in week thirteen...well, there was a reason he couldn't remember that week at all. After that week, he had given up, mostly because he had been too weak to sit up, let alone fight back. By the time he had recovered enough to do that, their psychological torture had ruined him.

Gene swallowed hard, forcing himself to remain normal. "Understandable. Now, let's get you interviewed, eh?"

"Will you go with me?" In that moment, the confidence she had exuded disappeared completely. Gene could see how great of a toll the past ten weeks had taken on her. She looked like a child, as though she might jump at her own shadow. Gene took in a deep breath. He really didn't want to hear how much she had suffered, but right now Alex needed him.

Gene nodded once. "Of course, Bolly."

She looked at him and smiled softly, and he could see that she was missing a few teeth. Rage boiled inside of him. He would get these three men back. He would make them suffer for what they did to him, but especially for what they did to Alex.

He and Alex walked together to the interview room, leaving Ray standing near the front doors. Gene figured that he would eventually shuffle back to CID.

They entered the room, the three men from Fenchurch West following closely behind them. Everyone took a position on their respective sides of the table, and only then did the DCI of Fenchurch West give a small smile.

"DI Drake. I'm DCI Abney. This is DI Toller, and DS Wyatt. We've taken over this case after Hunt told us that one of your own was involved. We're just here to ask a few questions and get an idea of what happened. First of all, can you give us a location of where you were kept? I'd like to dispatch my team to try and arrest those men if possible.

Gene personally thought they should have done that before she had been dragged off to the doctor, but he bit his tongue.

Alex looked down at the table and nodded her head. "I was in a block of flats. They kept me in an abandoned one. I'm not sure of the number, but the address... 25 Cardigan Street. That's the Borough of Lambeth."

"That's me out," the DI said, standing up and walking out of the room.

"He'll contact their division and they'll get the men who kidnapped you," DCI Abney said confidently.

Gene couldn't help but notice the slight disbelieving smile on Alex's face and realised that she was thinking the exact same way he was. They had waited too long to go after the men. The men would have realised she was gone by now. They would have abandoned the flat and disappeared from the face of the earth by now.

"So Alex, please explain what happened to you."

Gene was interested in hearing this. For weeks he had wondered how she had been kidnapped in broad daylight.

Alex swallowed, biting her lip. "I went to get the bacon that day for Gene. As I was heading back to the flat, Poirot apprehended me. He told me that there was a robbery in progress. I hadn't taken my radio, so I believed him. He got in to drive. When we got to the flat block, he pulled a gun and said I had to obey him or I would be dead."

Alex looked down at the ground. "So I did. I tried to find a way out for ten weeks, besides jumping out the window. Today, Nigel Bloodworth came in to the room. No doubt he intended to beat and torture me as they have done many times in the past. However, I decided that I was going to fight back. I knocked him out."

Gene noted how she swelled with pride when she said this. He was proud of her too. She was far from the defenceless woman he had once thought she was. She was stronger than he could believe.

"What did you do after you knocked him out?" the DCI asked.

"I realised the door was unlocked and I ran. I didn't stop until I ran into PC Logan and we radioed for the car."

Abney nodded, his fingers in a steeple beneath his chin. A cigarette was hanging out of his mouth, the ash still connected as he puffed on it.

"You've identified one of the men that took you hostage," Abney said. "Can you please identify anyone else?"

"Charlie Poirot," Alex said immediately. "I heard that he is dead now, though. Tom Blackwood was the leader. The other was Jack Romilly."

Abney nodded. "Sorry, Alex. That's just verification. Now, would you please describe what happened to you?"

Alex swallowed, and he could see in her eyes the pain she had suffered through. He wanted to reassure her somewhat, but what reassurance could he give? She was better than he was, she would be able to get through this without any help at all. She went straight to the station no problem. He had hidden for a month, plotting how to kill them.

As Alex started to tell her story, Gene felt the rage rising within him. The only thing that he was thankful for was that they had been able to control their urges and hadn't taken advantage of her. Gene knew that one of the worst things to do, if not the worst, was to rape a woman. He abhorred anyone who committed the crime, and some of his worst beatings had been given to suspected rapists. It was a crime that could totally break a woman, and she would never be the same again. And though these men were criminals, terrible, awful people, they were not animals.

After a while, Alex stopped talking, tears in the corners of her eyes. He knew it was the pain of the memories, but that she would be stronger than the memories were. Soon enough, she would be able to move on. She would heal and resume the DI position at Fenchurch East. Her ten weeks would just be an occasional nightmare in the future, something to be forgotten soon after she woke up in the morning.

But he would live with it forever. God only knew if he was going to return to the police. Gene didn't know if they would even allow him back in the same position. Dannell had been DCI in Fenchurch East for nearly a year now, and the men were used to him. Gene would have to be recertified in everything, a big waste of police time. Not only that, but they would have to make sure that he was mentally sound to go back.

As of the moment, he knew he wasn't. He was still haunted by nightmares and he had barely ate anymore. After being starved for so long, he just couldn't find food appealing. He had only eaten because Alex forced the foods on him, but since she had been gone, he had gone days without even really thinking of it. Once Ray had noticed that Gene wasn't eating as much, he had started to push food, but even then, Gene's meals were small.

Gene suddenly realised that Alex and Abney were looking at him expectantly. "What?"

"We've heard everything that we need to," Abney said. "Alex was wondering if you just wanted to leave for today."

Gene nodded. "Keep me updated."

"Dannell will. We're working closely with him."

Gene nodded and they said their goodbyes, walking out of the station. "Let's get you to hospital," he said to Alex.

She turned to look at him, one of her hazel eyes hidden by swelling, the other with a dark bruise underneath. The white of that eye was red with blood. However, he could see the stubbornness in them. Both the set of her jaw and her body stance said 'No', but he ignored all those signs.

"You need to get checked out. Even the doctor said so."

"You didn't go, I'm not going."

"Stop being such a stubborn cow. I told you earlier that you were going to go."

"_I'm_ the stubborn cow," Alex muttered under her breath, irritated.

Gene gave a small smile, but it didn't really meet his eyes. "C'mon, Bolls. Or I'll make Dannell take you."


	8. Chapter 8

**So this chapter is a bit different... as in...I was super nice to Alex? And I may have written fluff?! Ah well, I will fix that with the ending I'm planning ;) (still no plans for them to die...much worse will ensue for them... :D...I MEAN...um...yeah... )**

**Chapter 8**

Alex sat on the bed in the A&E, staring at Gene, irritated. "You take me here just to discover I have broken ribs," she said dryly.

"You could have had a concussion," Gene said shrugging.

"Last time you were concerned about that, you just had Shaz patch me up and then took me home to sleep."

"Left me minutes from my sexual peak."

Against her will, Alex gave a small smile, before becoming serious and raising an eyebrow. She saw movement outside of her room. "I'd rather help you reach your sexual peak than be here."

Gene's eyebrows rose up as high as they could go and his mouth dropped open. Before he could say anything, however, a nurse bustled in.

"Ms. Drake, the doctor gave the okay to discharge you. I've got to get your papers ready, but we should be able to get you out of here in about half an hour."

Alex nodded at the nurse, knowing that as soon as she walked out of the room, Gene would be demanding to know why she said that. His mouth was still hanging open. This was the longest Alex had ever heard without him making some comment back.

"You want to help me reach my sexual peak?" Gene asked, his voice sounding strangled.

Alex raised an eyebrow at him, smirking in amusement. "Not anymore, Gene. You took me to hospital."

"But you would have done," he responded slowly.

They were treading into dangerous waters here, but for some reason, Alex didn't mind. She had spent a year thinking that Gene was dead. She had scolded herself for not telling him how she felt for most of that year. And then, when he came back, she had been imprisoned. Why should she wait any longer to acknowledge how she felt?

He was staring at her, waiting for her answer. Finally, she bit her lip and nodded, giving a small smile. There was tension in the air between them, Gene frowning slightly, as if confused.

"But not just a one off," she added, feeling her face turning red.

"When did you decide that?"

Alex looked down at her feet, which were hanging off the bed. "The Bonfire Night we spent in Lewes."

"Why didn't you tell me?" His voice was deep, raw. Gene's eyes were slightly narrowed, but more with concentration than with any other emotion.

"I didn't know how you felt. For all I knew, I'd tell you and you'd laugh in my face."

"I would never...I _could_ never...Alex..." With the utterance of her name, his voice was several pitches deeper. His voice seemed more gravelly than ever, still sounding somewhat strangled.

His eyes met hers and she looked deep into them. The protective shield that usually covered them was gone. She could still see the pain hidden in there, but above that was disbelief along with hope. And hidden underneath all of that was desperation. She knew that what she was seeing was the frenzied attempt to make her understand how he felt.

Alex knew in that moment that he felt the same way about her that she did about him. They had been fighting it since the moment she had arrived, dressed as a hooker, but somewhere along the line they had failed. Still, she had to be sure.

"Do you...?"

Gene swallowed, looking down. "I think I'm in the same boat as you, Bolls."

They both stared at the floor, neither quite sure what to say or what to think. Both were too stunned at the revelations that they had finally admitted to each other. Now they could go forward in their relationship, but they didn't know what to do. Too long had been spent skirting around the issue, giving longing glances but not daring to act upon them. Now here they were, their words hanging in the air, but neither was brave enough to make the first move.

"When did you realise?" Alex asked, needing to break the long silence.

"Shit, Alex, I don't even know. I knew before I went into that hellhole, but I can't pinpoint when that one night shag that went through my head turned into wanting to actually spend time with you. Somewhere between sea scallops with pineapple rings and Doctor Death, I think."

Alex remembered back to the time, how close they had been before both their worlds had been ripped apart by the four men. Gene was still staring at the floor, refusing to look at her, and they lapsed into silence once more.

"So what do we do now?" she said, breaking the tense silence once more.

At that moment, her nurse walked in the room, a stack of papers in hand. "Ms. Drake, I've got your discharge paperwork, so I'll need your signature on a few of these forms."

The tension immediately dissolved as the nurse started discussing how to treat her ribs for the next few weeks and other medical advice that Alex didn't really care about. She was too caught up in what had just happened. Where were they going to go from here? This timid expression of their feelings was nothing like she had expected it to be. No, she had thought that if they ever revealed their feelings, it would be during an extremely angry row, and then they'd rage at each other through sex until one finally gave in. But this meek and shy way...They were both terrified to make the first move. Alex knew, however, that someone had to, otherwise they'd be skirting around the issue for the rest of the day. For that reason, as soon as she was released and they got to Gene's car, she turned around and kissed him.

He tried to pull away for a moment, absolutely stunned, but then realised what was happening. He put his arms around her, pulling her closer to him. Alex moved her hands through his hair, feeling the softness of the dirty blond she had always admired.

She parted her lips slightly, and Gene's tongue met hers. He pulled her even closer, wrapping his arms around her waist. A few moments later, she moved her hands from his hair to his neck as they broke apart, both breathing heavily.

"What the bloody hell was that?" Gene asked, his fingers in her hair, eyes twinkling in amusement.

Alex raised an eyebrow. "Just excitement at getting out of the hospital, I suppose. Unfortunately, that's the only way I can show my excitement in public without getting arrested."

Gene's eyebrows shot up as he comprehended her meaning. "Well then, I guess we better get you home ASAP."

A few hours later, they lay together in bed, naked. Gene was dozing next to her, and her hand was gently stroking the down of golden hair on his chest. It was a horrifying experience for them both to see each other's wounds. Some of Gene's scars were still a bright pink, but others had faded to white. When she ran her hands down his back, she was able to feel his spine and finally realised how much weight he had really lost while she was imprisoned.

Her wounds were much more visible than his, bruises fresh and fading all over her body. Gene had given something between a snarl and a growl of rage when he saw, and then spent the next several minutes kissing every wound on her, all while stroking her gently down below, making her writhe and murmur his name with need.

Their love-making had been more tender than she had ever imagined, more of an affirmation of life than of the furious tension that had run through them since 1981. Part of that, however, was the fact that Gene was terrified of hurting her already-painful ribs. They had slowly climaxed together, and it had left them both satisfied, but wanting more at the same time. Soon after, they had engaged in a more vigorous expression of their feelings.

Now, her ribs were extremely sore, giving a sharp stab of pain every time she inhaled. That, coupled with her racing mind prevented her from reaching the sleep she so desperately needed. On their way home from hospital, Ray had radioed Gene to tell them that the men had not been found. She wondered how long it would be before they went after her and Gene again. Alex knew they would. These men were not the sort to leave a job unfinished. The only question was why they hadn't actually taken Gene out already

Of course, she knew from the PC driving the squad car that Poirot had shot him. What he hadn't mentioned was that Gene had been shot six times, something she had only found out once Gene was stripped bare in front of her. She was confused as to why they only tried to kill him once, but was relieved that they hadn't been able to.

Gene started snoring next to her. Alex smiled at the familiar sound. During the month after Gene escaped, it was a sound that she had grown used to. When she was imprisoned, it was the sound that she had really missed. However, it was extremely loud right next to her ear, and at the same time, it was inhibiting her thinking.

Alex got out of the bed, putting on a dressing gown and walked out to the kitchen. After making a cup of tea, she went to the sofa and turned on the telly. It was only just ten in the evening, so luckily there was a decent show on. Alex curled up on her sofa, enjoying the warmth of the tea and the soft cushions underneath her. These were both luxuries to her after ten weeks of room-temperature water and a mattress that had probably been around before the Second World War.

However, even though she had not watched telly in ten weeks, Alex found that she just couldn't get interested in the show. Her mind was too fixated on how absolutely mental her day had been. Thirteen hours ago, she had no idea whether or not she'd see any of the men that day. Eleven hours ago, she had breathed her first breath of fresh air in two and a half months. Five hours ago, they had left the hospital. Four hours ago, she had enjoyed her first shower in ten weeks. And three and a half hours ago, she had emerged, clad only in a towel, nervous and excited to have Gene's eyes roving over her in clear approval. Now, he was asleep and she was drinking tea, like it was the most normal day in the world.

The most shocking thing to her was that they had finally revealed how they felt. They had been trapped in the nervous dance for so long, and finally the dance had ended. Things were going to change from here on out, Alex knew. They were going to look after one other much more carefully now.

And she would be damned if Gene went missing for another eleven months.

"You should be sleeping," Gene's gravelly voice said behind her. "You need it."

Alex jumped, the tea sloshing in the bottom of her cup. She had been so deep in thought, she hadn't realised that the television had turned to static, that she had mostly drunk her now-cold tea, and that Gene's snoring had stopped.

"What are you doing up?" Alex asked.

"Should ask you the same thing."

"I couldn't sleep."

"I got cold. Woke up and the sheets were at the bottom of the bed and you were gone!"

Alex gave a small smile. "I had too much to think about."

"Christ," Gene said despairingly, a twinkle in his eyes. "You only just got back today! It's too early for your brain to be whirring about yet. Take off until tomorrow."

When Alex failed to respond to his gentle teasing, Gene sat down on the couch next to her. "That was supposed to amuse you."

She nestled in next to him and he threw an arm around her. Both of them were surprised by how easily and naturally this came to them, but neither wanted to question it."

"So what happens when they come back?" Alex asked, wishing her voice didn't sound so small. "Because they will, you know."

"I'm not sure," Gene replied, seeming as though he regretted coming out of the bedroom.

"I'm afraid of what Nigel will do," she whispered, feeling weak to admit her fear. Tears were gathering in the corners of her eyes, but she refused to let them fall. "I knocked him out, so what if Tom doesn't make him stop? What if he does what he wanted to?"

Gene pulled her into him protectively, resting his head on hers. "I won't let that happen, Alex," he growled gently. "Whatever I do, I'm going to protect you."

**I want to thank everyone for their reviews on this so far! I know I don't send out personal thank yous...(I am SO AWKWARD that your message would just be me rambling in appreciation and then saying 'yeah so...um thanks' as a conclusion and I embarass myself IRL enough to prevent myself from doing that on the internet...[see what i mean about rambling?!]) But I really do appreciate every single review that comes in on any of my stories. It means a lot that you all have stuck with me for so long and just... thank you :)**

**-Rant**

**(ps, I'm having trouble with chapter 9 because I want two separate things and it's deciding whether to include some fun or to skip the fun (leaning towards the fun) but still...I'm hesitant about raising this fic to an M rating...but i think I might do...**

**And now I'm rambling again!**


	9. Chapter 9

**Thank you all for your reviews last time! People seemed to be in favour of the fun (why, I don't know) but you know... I was in favour of the fun too, but my characters are stubborn bastards that demand what they want to be written. I try and deviate from that and they give me a metaphorical kick in the nuts. But I hope you enjoy it anyway!**

**This chapter brought to you by boredom during lectures over the business side of nursing *gag* and acute kidney injury. **

**Chapter 9**

Three months had passed since Alex had suddenly returned, and they had heard nothing from the three men. She had returned to work the month before, being declared mentally and physically fit for duty. He still hadn't even attempted.

In truth, Gene was frustrated. He had been free for nearly seven months and he was still acting like a pansy. He hadn't considered going back to work, and spent his days hanging around Alex's flat, trying to figure out something to do.

Gene knew he was frustrating Alex as well. She tried to put up with him, but he still hadn't talked to anyone about his torture, including her. He knew that she was of the opinion that if he got it all out, he would feel better. Gene felt as though that was the last thing that was keeping him a man. If he went to a doctor to talk about his _feelings_ then what separated him from a poofter?

Besides, he was doing something that she didn't know about. When she was at work, he was actually busy, planning. He had told Alex once that he was going to get the men back, and he had meant it. They wouldn't be getting him again, much less getting her. Gene wanted to make sure that they were all dead. If they were dead, he reasoned, then there would be no reason to have nightmares anymore. The nightmares would be over with their lives.

The planning was slow, though, mostly because he had to make sure that Alex saw none of it, which meant an hour leeway after she left for and before she came back from work, just in case. He also had to put away his plans around noon, because sometimes she would drop by to have lunch. However, drawing in at the end of six months, everything was slowly starting to fall into place. If Alex found out, she would halt everything, and he might be arrested for conspiracy to murder. They wouldn't understand. They hadn't been through what he had. Neither had Alex. She had spent ten weeks there, yes, but she hadn't gone through the eleven months of hell. If she spent eleven months there, then she would be plotting with him. He was certain of that.

Gene sighed to himself. It didn't really matter, did it? He could have this plan, hide it from Alex, but until he found the men, it wouldn't matter. They had to find him first. And he wasn't sure if he was willing to put himself out there for them to catch.

The door opened, and he heard Alex sigh as she walked in the door. There was a rustle of fabric as she threw down her jacket.

"Gene?"

"Over here, love," he called, tossing down the book he hadn't actually been reading. He had never been the 'stay at home' type, but now he found that he was spending too much time at Alex's flat. She had bought him books to tide him over between the times she was home and the times he chose to go out. She had gathered loads of westerns from second hand book shops, as well as random other novels and novellas. He had slowly been making his way through them, but he had never been the person who would read for fun. This was mostly a way to relieve his boredom, and in a weird way, it seemed therapeutic.

Alex appeared in the room, looking slightly worse for wear. Her hair looked like she had been dragging her hands through it all day, and her shirt was wrinkled and only half tucked into her jeans. He knew that they were dealing with a big case at the moment, and it looked ike it had taken a toll on her todaoy.

Alex flopped down, lying in front of him on the sofa. He wrapped his arms around her and placed a kiss on her head. Gene never thought that he was this tender, that he _could_ be, but maybe something had changed during those eleven months. "Long day?" he asked, and Alex sighed.

"Some days, I really wonder how Ray made it to DS."

"I wondered that every single day I worked with him," Gene said. "But then I realised that DS just stands for dog shit."

Alex laughed and he smiled inwardly at the sound. "Some days he's just not there. And it's been happening more and more recently. And with Dannell breathing down my neck all the time, I need the DS to help me."

Gene sighed, adjusting himself so that he was underneath her and twisting her so that she lay on him facedown. He kissed her hard, before pulling his face away and staring straight into her eyes that had darkened in lust. "You're at home, Alex. No more work. Unless you wanted to arrest me," he added as an afterthought.

Alex sat up, starting to unbutton his shirt slowly. Gene felt himself shiver as her fingers brushed against his skin, reaching up to smooth her wild hair down.

"Why would I arrest you?" she asked softly, running her hands up his chest and dipping her head to kiss him. "Have you been breaking the law?"

"You know it, Bolly," he murmured back, pulling off her soft jumper and undoing her bra, letting her breasts spill out and sucking a nipple into his mouth. She moaned at the sensation, reaching down to undo his belt and unbutton his trousers. "But maybe you shouldn't arrest me..."

"Now that you say you don't want to be arrested...What have you been doing?" she whispered, opening her eyes to focus on him and reaching down to stroke his cock.

Gene rubbed his hand between her legs, over her jeans and her eyes closed again, letting out a sigh of pleasure.

"Right now, I'm bribing an officer."

"Oh?" she asked, her eyes still closed, moving against his hand.

Gene smirked. "Yes." He pushed her over, moving them so he was on top of her. "Don't arrest me, officer, otherwise I can't do this." He reached beneath her jeans, feeling the silk of her knickers before sliding his fingers between her folds, brushing her clit once. Her hips jolted up as though she had been shocked and she let out a moan of need.

"I dunno," she said, wriggling against Gene's fingers, which were now rubbing against her insistently. "I might have to get out my handcuffs. Bribing an officer, that's very bad."

Gene pulled away from her, unbuttoning her jeans and pulling them down her legs, kicking them to the bottom of the sofa. He kissed her neck, growling in her ear. "If you get out your handcuffs, I might have to overpower you and handcuff you instead."

"But then I couldn't do this," she murmured, reaching down into his pants and starting to stroke him again.

Gene groaned with pleasure at the feel of her hand on his cock. "I don't think either of us is going to get arrested today, Bolly," he said, closing his eyes and letting the feel of her working him take over.

"Not even for indecent exposure?"

"I've got enough of a punishment for you for that."

He pulled himself out of her hand, kissing down her chest. Gene stopped at her breasts, biting each nipple, feeling it harden in his mouth. Alex urged her hips against his, but he took no notice, stroking down her body, kissing down to her stomach.

"What's my punishment?" she asked, her eyes glittering with desire.

"You almost sound too eager," Gene said dryly, placing a kiss against her navel.

Alex said nothing, but her silence spurred Gene into continuing. He continued to kiss her, down to her knee, and then back up her thigh into the crease where leg and body met. He licked one side lightly, and then the other, delighting in the quickening of her breath.

"Should I, Alex?" he murmured, breathing on her, smelling the scent of her arousal.

Alex said nothing in response, merely raised her hips to him. Gene raised an eyebrow, but licked her once, tasting her on his tongue. It was a taste he would never tire of. Nothing could compare to her.

Gene ran his finger down in between her folds, gently slipping on finger inside. She was hot and wet, ready for him. He could feel the pressure from his arousal, but ignored it, slipping another finger into her and moving them slowly.

"See officer?" he murmured. "This is why you don't arrest men like me."

"Yes," she moaned. "I get it now. But I think you can do better."

"Oh?" Gene pressed his tongue against her clit, licking twice before pulling his head back up. "Like that?"

"Even better than that," Alex said, her hips starting to rise with more urgency at the feel of his fingers inside her.

Gene put his mouth on her then, sucking her clit into his mouth and grazing it with his teeth gently. He added a third finger, letting them slide in and out of her quickly, matching the thrusts of her hips.

"Gene, oh god!" she said, and he knew her orgasm was close.

Gene abruptly pulled his fingers out of her, and set his head on her stomach. Alex moaned at the loss, her hips still urging upwards.

"Gene, please."

"Please what?"

"Let me come, Gene, please."

Gene just smirked, gently slipping one finger back inside her, making his rhythm furiously slow. He brought her to the edge twice more, until she was begging him. Gene smiled then, removing his boxers and trousers in one swift motion and thrusting his cock inside her. He brushed her clit once and felt her convulse around him as he finally let her come. Alex let out a wordless shout of pleasure, her whole body stiffening, her eyes open and her mouth wide. He waited for her to relax, before beginning to move inside her, long languid strokes that would allow her to recover and yet continue the pleasure. He dropped his face to hers, kissing her, knowing that she could taste herself on his tongue.

The thought made him ache with pleasure, and he felt his rhythm increasing as she started to encourage him more with her hips. He stared into her eyes, the lust mixing with desire as he felt himself starting to slowly spiral out of control. Gene stroked her clit and after a few moments, felt her convulse around him again, coming harder than she had the first time. He lost control then, his hips jerking erratically before his whole body tightened and he spilled into her.

Gene lay down on top of her, still inside her, both of them breathing heavily.

"We're good at this," Alex said with a trace of amusement.

"Of course we are. We practice enough."

"We never figured out who was going to arrest who."

"I punished you, Bolly. That's enough, isn't it?" He pulled out of her, gathering his arms around her, loving the feel of her bare back against his skin."

"How did you punish me?"

Gene ran a hand over her breast, smiling as her nipple peaked underneath his thumb.

"I made you beg," he said simply.

Realisation dawned in Alex's eyes. "That was so cruel. Imagine if I did that to you. It'd be torture."

"I'd love it if you did that to me. You could use your mouth..." Gene cut off, too entranced by the frankly filthy scenario that was playing out in his head.

"I'd get out the cuffs for that," Alex said, turning her head to smirk at him. "Handcuff you to the headboard. You wouldn't be able to touch me then."

"Why wouldn't you want me to touch you?" Gene asked, his hand over her stomach.

"You like to join in," she said. "If your hands are on my head, how can I stop you from coming?"

"You _are_ evil, Bolls," Gene breathed, the scenario in his head getting even filthier.

Alex turned over, her breasts pressing against his chest. "It'd help me take my mind off work," she said innocently.

Gene grinned. "Let's get some pasta from Luigi. I need to eat something. After that, I'll help you take your mind off work."

**I wrote some of this sandwiched between two girls during a lecture. I hope neither of them looked over at my screen because, well...**

**Also, I hope this was okay...I don't write much smut (obv) so I get to a certain point in writing it and just go...'um...okay?' Also...I don't know how to describe these things from the male perspective but Gene demanded to be written in _this_ chapter instead of Alex. *rolls eyes* My characters are tenacious asshats.**


	10. Chapter 10

**Thank you for your reviews last time! I really appreciated them because I was very unsure about it!**

**The next three chapters are brought to you by picking up overnights at work and spending those eight hours staring at a computer and watching people sleep... (Seriously, doing that from 11pm to 7am makes for a loooooooooong shift...)**

**Chapter 10**

Alex lay in bed, hearing Gene snoring gently next to her. She had the day off today, something that she rejoiced in. Ray had really been too much the day before, and if she had to see him again today there was no telling what she would do. She was certain that Dannell wouldn't appreciate her incapacitating his DS, and Gene wouldn't like her hurting his friend.

Sighing, she got out of bed, pulling her dressing gown over her naked form. She and Gene had been up most of the night, but she was never able to sleep past eight. Gene might sleep until noon, something he had picked up from long nights of stakeouts. She had been a mother once, however. She had gotten used to a few minutes of sleep here and there. She could function on four hours of sleep as well as ten hours.

Alex walked out of the bedroom, going to the kitchen and making coffee to start the day. She could never drink tea in the morning. It just wasn't bitter enough to wake her up. As the coffee brewed, she went to the sofa, stretching out on the couch and turning on the television. As usual, there was nothing on in the morning, and she walked over to the video shelf to find something to watch. They had acquired a mass of videos in the past several months, mostly so Gene wouldn't throw the telly out the window at sheer despair in daytime television. She looked over her favourites, but decided against one of those. If Gene came out, he would complain, and she didn't want to listen to that this morning. Instead, she decided to put on a western. She didn't really mind them, and if Gene woke up, they could watch it together, without arguing. Alex didn't mind getting in a blazing row with him – the make up sex was fantastic – but it wasn't quite what she wanted to be doing on one of her rare days off.

Alex put the cassette in the VCR and poured herself a cup of coffee, waiting for the adverts to play through. It gave her the time to make a somewhat decent breakfast and Gene might wake up to the smell of food.

However, as the opening theme to the movie started, he was still snoring loudly and she sighed, smiling. Nothing was going to wake him up at the moment. It'd be a film to herself then.

Alex grabbed her breakfast and coffee, and went to sit down on the sofa. She was just settling in when she saw a small pad of paper on the floor. She didn't recall seeing it before. It must have fallen off the shelf when she picked out the film. Curiosity piqued, she walked over to the pad on the floor and picked it up. Alex started to read through it, shock and fury beginning to course through her as she continued. She wanted to put it down, but she couldn't. She couldn't stop herself from reading it.

When she had reached the final page, she was in a full rage. Breakfast and film forgotten, she stormed to the bedroom, throwing a pillow at Gene to wake him up. He snorted awake, staring at her in confusion.

"What did you do that for?" he asked, his voice still thick with sleep.

"Exactly how long have you been planning this?" Alex spat, throwing the pad of paper at him.

Gene picked it up frowning, his face growing horrified as he realised what it was. However he quickly changed the fear to anger. "How dare you read that?!" he yelled, standing and putting his dressing gown on.

"It was on the floor! I went to pick it up!" Alex yelled back.

"That's private information!"

"About conspiracy to murder three men in cold blood!"

"You were their hostage too! Surely you can realise that they need to be ended!"

"Not ended, Gene. They need to go to jail." Her voice was carefully calm, and she could see Gene's consternation at the sudden pitch change. However, it just made him angrier, instead of calming him, as she hoped it would.

"If they go to jail, then they get free! When they get out, where are they going to go?!"

"You are talking about using live bait, Gene!" She was yelling again, and gave a hysterical laugh. "Jesus Christ! I thought we were supposed to protect each other!"

"We are!"

"_THEN WHY AM I THE BAIT?!" _she bellowed, wishing she had something else to throw at him.

Gene stared at her, completely lost for words. "Alex..."

"No! You don't _dare_ try to excuse yourself! Gene...I've lived with you for three months! And all this time, you've been wanting to use me as _bait?!_ 'Don't worry Alex, I'll never let them get you.' That was all just an act! You've been hoping for them to get me! You were probably thrilled when I went missing for ten weeks!"

"I could never be happy when you're missing!" Gene yelled back, his whole posture defensive. However, Alex wasn't having any of it and continued to yell at him.

"You couldn't be happy with me gone, but you want me to be bait! You want to sit on your arse and watch me get kidnapped by those bastards again!"

"I'd keep you safe!" Gene protested.

"How?! You say you'll protect me, but you want to throw me to the wolves! Is the only thing you're going to protect me from if they decide to try and rape me Gene? Will you let them beat me within an inch of my life again? Will you just sit and watch as they laugh in my bloody face?"

Alex stared at him, her chest heaving. She was so incredibly angry at him, but no words were able to convey her anger. At the moment, she wanted to hurt him, to see him suffer. She had thought that he loved her. But now, he had just been keeping her close until the time was right. He had made her believe that she meant something to him, but in the end, he was just using her in his twisted plot.

The anger was overwhelming her. She was shaking with the effort of trying not to punch him, which she knew would be completely useless. Gene would stop her fists before they had ever reached their targets. If she did that, she would end up in tears against him and she couldn't have that. As it was, she felt a lump rising in her throat. She blinked back the burning sensation in her eyes, but cursed as she felt one hot tear fall down her cheek.

Gene reached up, looking concerned, to wipe it away, but she slapped him away.

"Don't you dare, you bastard. I want you out of here," she hissed, not daring to talk any louder. If she did, her voice might tremble and give her away even more.

"I didn't write it, Alex," he said, looking desperate and hurt, but still stiff-back and angry. "I would _never_ use you as bait."

"I've seen the notebook, Gene. It's your bloody handwriting. Don't even try to lie to me now!"

Gene rocked onto the balls of his feet, seeming to try and keep his temper in check. His fists were clenched at his sides and a vein was pulsing in his temple. "Fine, Alex. I'll leave. When you realise what a twat you're being, you can call me back."

"Get your clothes on and get out," Alex said, her voice icy cold.

With that, she left the bedroom, slamming the door behind her. She waited with her arms crossed until the door opened again, Gene now clad jeans and a button up shirt, with a bag hanging over his shoulder. He barely looked at her until he reached the door, where he threw the notebook back at her.

"I don't know what that is, but it sure as shit isn't my handwriting. Besides, Alex, you should know by now that I would never willingly put you in the line of fire."

He seemed to want to say something else, but his jaw clenched instead. Gene turned on the ball of his foot without another word, leaving and closing the door behind him.

Alex stared at the door for a long moment before looking at the notebook. It was his handwriting. She had seen it long enough to know what was and wasn't. However...

Alex stared a long moment at the form of the 'G's' and the 'J's'. Usually, the curve in the bottom of the letter was a sharp thirty-degree angle. Those in the notebook seemed a bit wider than thirty degrees. She noticed that the circles on the O's seemed a bit more round as well than they did before.

_Could it be from all the months spent imprisoned? _Alex wondered, unsure if his handwriting would change merely from him not using a pen for eleven months.

Before she had time to ponder long, however, the door to her flat burst open. Two men walked in, looking as though they owned the place.

"Alex!" Nigel said, an easygoing yet maniacal smile on his face. "Long time, no see. Seems to me that I owe you for the last time we parted. I had a nasty bruise for a while."

"Seems she owes _us, _Nigel," Tom said, looking at her evenly. "We were so hospitable to her last time and she just ran away from us."

"I'm not going back with you!" Alex yelled, backing into the bedroom where her gun lay on the bedside table.

Tom merely sighed, as though she was a rather annoying child. "Don't take another step, Alexandra."

Nigel pulled a gun out of his jacket.

"As much as we _don't_ want to shoot you, we will not hesitate to do so."

Alex stared at them, debating. This was all part of Gene's plan, wasn't it? Lure the men here, use her as bait, and then run to the rescue? However, was that plan still valid now that she had thrown him out? Or did he have to be present for it all to work out? She didn't particularly care to get shot, but she didn't want to get captured without a fight, either.

Sighing heavily, Alex raised her hands, as if in surrender.

"Okay, okay. You win. Just...don't shoot." She took a step backward and stumbled, falling to the floor. On her was down, Alex knocked the gun off the table towards her. She picked it up and rolled onto her back, pointing it at the two men. "I'm _not _going," she stated flatly.

Nigel smirked, but Tom merely sighed as though he was bored. "This isn't an action film, Alex. We're not going to have a mad shootout before something blows up behind us. In real life, there are no antagonists and protagonists. There's only pain, suffering, and traitors."

"Was Poirot a traitor?" she asked, her gun still held high.

"Poirot wasn't a traitor. But we weren't talking about ourselves, Alex. We were talking about someone who's betrayed _you."_

"What do you mean?"

"Bless!" said Tom. "She still doesn't get it. Do you _really _think that after eleven months, we'd just toss Gene into the Thames?" Tom shook his head. "We wanted _you _Alex, so we set Gene free to fetch you."

"He would never," Alex whispered, the past seven months running through her head.

"Maybe not a year and a half ago, but starve and torture a man within an inch of a life, and who knows what he'll become? Gene Hunt became our little pet," Nigel said, the smug grin never leaving his face.

"But...Poirot tried to kill him."

"Gene was never supposed to be seen by anyone but you. By going with Danell to the station, he took on the responsibility that he might be killed," Tom said with a non-committal shrug.

"But he _named you._" Alex was sitting up, her gun still pointing at the men, but it was slowly being lowered in disbelief.

"He had a small lapse, yes. No doubt his freedom made him feel a bit stronger. Poirot shooting him put him back in his place."

"I don't believe you," Alex whispered, her gun now lax in her grip. "Gene wouldn't."

"Oh?" Nigel asked, pulling a radio out of his pocket. "Come on up."

Alex was rooted on the floor, unable to believe the story they were telling her. Nigel still had his gun on her, but it was pointed lazily. After what seemed like an eternity, they heard her front door open and shut. Gene walked into the bedroom, his hair slightly ruffled and he sleeves pushed up to his elbows. He looked at her, a hard glint in his eye, completely closed off from her.

"Gene," she said, pleading with him.

He stared at her coldly in reply. After a moment, he spoke. "Put your gun away, Alex. There's no point in fighting anymore."

Alex was furious now, the rage flowing white-hot through her veins. She never recalled a time when she had felt this pissed off, not even when she had found out that Pete was cheating on her. Alex dropped the gun and stood up straight. Tears were burning in her eyes and fell freely down her cheeks, but she no longer cared.

Alex marched over to Gene, staring at him in cold animosity. Before she knew exactly what was happening, her fist was flying up at his face.

His hand caught her wrist before her fist made contact, and he stared at her dispassionately.

"Enough," he said firmly, but she tried to hit him with her other hand. He caught that one as well, and put both of her wrists together, holding them in one strong hand.

"I said, _enough!" _She saw his hand fly up in the corner of her vision, but before she could do anything, the palm of it hit against her temple.

There was a blinding pain and the feeling of falling before the whole world faded to black. Then there was nothing but the cold.

**(To be honest, this chapter took me by surprise too, but I guess Gene hides his secrets rather well, eh?)**


	11. Chapter 11

**Sorry about the cliffhanger last time guys! But you know... it makes things more fun?**

**Chapter 11**

She wasn't doing well. That was one of the things that Gene knew for certain. Every time he was forced into the room, he could see that her life force was slowly ebbing away. She spent most days sleeping now, and if she wasn't, she was more than likely delirious from pain.

Gene stared at the knuckles of his hand, which was chained to a wall. There were bruised and scraped, covered in blood.

_Her blood,_ he thought miserably.

He hated seeing it on his hands, a reminder of what he had done to her. Every time he slapped or punched her, he felt himself die a little more inside. Watching her cringe away, the flash of fear in her eyes when she saw him was even worse. The men had made her think that he hated her, and he could do absolutely nothing about it.

Three months previously, when Alex had found that notebook, he had walked out, feeling hurt and confused. Yes, he had the idea of live bait, but _he_ was supposed to be the bait, but not her. And then later, looking at the notebook, he had realised it was not his handwriting. His was very straight and narrow, whereas the notebook's handwriting was somewhat loopier. Still, it was very good forgery, and people not skilled in studying handwriting probably wouldn't have noticed. The only reason he had was because it was his handwriting.

Gene heard a whimper from the room next door and knew that Alex was awake. He had long ago learned the difference between her sleeping and waking. Awake, she was too proud to let anyone know what sort of agony she was in. Therefore, he mostly heard grunts and whimpers, and an occasional muffled sob, even when she was delirious. When she was asleep, that was when he heard the agonised groans of the pain she was truly in.

The problem was, she would not stop fighting. If she would just relent, the beatings wouldn't be as severe. He had learned that the first time he was imprisoned by these madmen.

Of course, he hadn't exactly given up either. He wasn't as blunt as Alex, but he would fight back. Gene knew that this subdued fight was working. They weren't torturing him nearly as badly as they had the first time around. However, it didn't help him with his ultimate goal: getting Alex out of there...and killing the men who had made her suffer.

Gene beating Alex was a cruel decree by Tom to punish Gene simply for being alive. Gene had screwed everything up by swimming out of the Thames, just as Alex had screwed up their plans by knocking Nigel out.

So now, they were both paying for it.

When Jack had told him what they wanted him to do to Alex, he had flatly refused. She might have been pissed off at him, and he at her, but he would never raise a hand to her. Jack had merely smiled at his protests and explained what would happen if he continued to refuse their demands.

"If you refuse to touch her, we will make both of you pay," he had said. "If you refuse, every day, we will take one joint of one finger. When her fingers are gone, we'll use her toes. And then, we will stab her in the back, but we won't let her die from that. We'll put the gun in your hands, and help you to pull the trigger. If you go after us instead of after her, we'll make it even worse for her. And you, you'll get to watch."

Gene had felt like a horrible bastard when he had knocked her out. He felt even worse with every beating they made him give her. But this was less torture than she might have had. He just hoped that one day, she would understand.

Alex was moving in her room, but he knew that she could not go far. He had been in the room a few days ago, when she had tried to stand. She had fallen to the floor immediately, unable to stop herself from crying out in pain. The only way her broken body would allow move now was to shuffle herself along, barely making it an inch at a time.

Gene heard her muttering to herself and hung his head. The muttering was never a good sign. It meant that she was hallucinating. He didn't know if the hallucinations were from pain or an infection, but either way, Gene knew that she wouldn't make it much longer.

"Mummy," he heard her weak voice say through the wall. It was slurred with pain. "The clown. Please Mummy. Get rid of the clown."

Gene wanted to say something, anything, to reassure her, but the men gagged him whenever they were gone. Besides, now that they had made her terrified of him, trying to talk to her might just simply make things worse.

He heard her move around a bit more before she went silent once again. Gene was always afraid when she went quiet for too long. At first, they had made him watch her when she was unconscious from a beating. A few weeks in, they realised Gene's concern over her, and the relief he felt just by watching her steady breathing, so they dragged him out immediately afterward. She may hate him now, but he didn't care. His concern for her was just as great as it had always been.

The door burst open and the three men walked in, all with smiles on their faces. That wasn't a good sign. When they were happy, something bad was going to happen.

"Remove the cuffs," Tom said cheerfully.

Jack hastened to obey, and soon Gene was rubbing his wrists, glaring at them all. He ripped the gag from his mouth, but received a kick in his stomach for doing so. He didn't really care. He had been on the receiving end of much worse from them.

Gene glared at them defiantly for a moment. "What the hell do you bastards want?"

He received another kick in the stomach, but ignored it once again.

Tom grinned widely. "Guess whose case has been declared officially cold and a waste of valuable police resources?"

"Ours, I'm assuming," Gene replied sarcastically.

"Yup!" Tom replied in a cheerful voice, his eyes glittering with a happy menace. "No one is looking for either of you anymore. So we're going to celebrate with a happy little phone call. Go get Alex, Gene."

Gene clenched his jaw, but nodded mutely. Nigel unlocked the door to her room and Gene stood, walking in. Alex was curled up in a ball on the mattress they had been kind enough to provide for her. His heart broke at the sight of her. Her face and body were a mass of bruises. Gene felt worse when he remembered that he had been the cause of many of them. He knelt down next to her, pretending not to notice that her arm stuck out at an odd angle.

Gene put his hand on the middle of her back, careful to avoid the shoulder of her suspected broken arm. "Alex," he murmured. Alex blinked awake, the eye that wasn't swollen shut resting on his face. After a moment of confusion, her whole face darkened.

"Piss off," she slurred. "Bastard traitor." It was clear that every syllable caused her pain, but at least she wasn't delirious.

"They want us in the other room," Gene said, ignoring her words.

She raised an eyebrow at him. "Well I can't bloody walk. Do you want me to crawl there on my belly? My right arm won't work either, so it might take a while." He could tell she was refusing to acknowledge the pain speaking caused her, needing to try and pierce him with the words of contempt flowing from her mouth, but still sighed in annoyance and frustration. It didn't matter if he told her that he wasn't with them, that they were torturing him too. She wouldn't believe him. He barely had a scratch on him, and they forced him to beat her at regular intervals. He had tried to refuse a few times, but when he did, the knife was pressing down on her finger in a heartbeat. If they made it out of this alive, she would probably never speak to him again.

"I'll carry you out of here," Gene said.

"Sod off."

Gene ignored her indignant protests, picking her up. He was careful to try not to hurt her, but he heard a sharp intake of breath as he pulled her close to him. She didn't try to pull away from him, but just lay motionless in his arms. Alex kept her neck still, refusing to look at him, and merely stared at her feet. He could feel the anger flowing off her in waves.

It was far worse to look at her up close, only inches away from his face. He could see how the colours of her bruises swirled together, yellow and black and purple and green. He could see where her scabs were fresh, and where they were old and starting to transition to scars. He wanted to apologise for what he had done, but even if he did, it wouldn't matter. As soon as he apologised, they'd make him hit her again. She would never believe him.

Gene sat her down in front of the men and stepped back uncertainly. They all smiled at her, but she ignored them, still staring at her feet.

"Alex," Tom said gently, and she looked at him. Her hazel eye was dark with hatred, but she remained silent. "I told Gene today that your case has been deemed officially cold. We all wanted to celebrate, so we're going to make a call to Fenchurch East." Nigel and Jack laughed, but Alex gave no inclination that she'd even heard Tom speak. As her injuries had added up, she had stopped fighting physically, but instead had started ignoring everyone and everything, throwing in some spiteful words if she felt it appropriate.

"Gene," Tom said, looking away from the woman on the floor. "Do you think that we should ring Carling, or Dannell?"

"Carling," Gene said without a moment's hesitation. He had worked with Ray for over ten years. He had known Dannell for five months. He would trust Ray with his life. Ray would get something done. Dannell? He just wasn't sure.

"Carling it is," Tom said happily. "Nigel, Jack, hold her up. Gene, it's your time to shine."

Gene closed his eyes and clenched his jaw, steeling himself for what was coming next. He nodded once, watching as Nigel and Jack wrenched Alex off the floor. She let out a shout of pain, but remained silent otherwise. The men put her arms behind her back, holding her wrists and underneath a shoulder each. She raised her head to stare him directly in the eye, her face dark and angry.

With a deep breath in, Gene took a step forward, clenching his hands into fists.

After what seemed like an eternity, Tom motioned for him to stop. Alex's head was lolling on her shoulders, and it seemed as though she was struggling to stay conscious. Nigel and Jack let her go, and she crashed to the floor, crying out as she hit.

Tom smiled, still holding the phone. He had rung Ray during the middle of the torture, when Alex's pain threshold had been reached and she was crying out in pain with every blow that fell on her. Tom had hung up before they could trace the call, but the beating had continued for long afterward.

"Oh Gene," Tom said softly. "Look at what you've done. I don't know if she's going to survive this."

Alex looked as though she was flickering in and out of consciousness. Her eye was unfocused, and she was blinking slowly, frowning as though trying to concentrate.

"Just think," Tom continued. "The last thing she will ever remember is that you did this to her." He gave a giant, winning grin, walking over to Gene. Tom stood there, smiling for a moment before he head butted Gene and kicked him in the groin. Gene doubled over, stunned, watching as the other two men advanced toward him.

The beating he received rivalled those of his last imprisonment. It seemed to last for hours; longer than any one had ever been before. When it was over, he lay on the floor, gasping for breath. Pain radiated all over, and every movement felt like agony.

Tom was still smiling widely. "It's been a while since I've done that!" he said happily, wiping Gene's blood off his face. "Usually, I let the boys do it, but getting in there is nice every once in a while!"

"Why now?" Gene asked finally. "Why wait and beat me now?"

"Because we wanted you to die knowing that you killed the woman you love. We didn't let you free on purpose Gene, nor did we let Alex overpower Nigel on purpose. But you must admit, they did have a wonderful turnout. We got to torture you both more. Because we realised, you two love each other, and what would be worse than hurting her yourself? Than her thinking you revel in it? Than her hating you as much as we do? Gene, we ruined your life. And that's all we really ever wanted."

Tom gave Gene another delighted smile before motioning to Jack. Jack stepped forward and pulled a knife out of his pocket. He opened it, walking to Alex, who was now unconscious in a crumpled heap on the floor. Smirking, he kicked her so that she was lying on her back. Alex's eye opened, but she didn't move to try and stop him. With an enormous flourish, Jack stabbed the knife into her stomach. She gasped and choked, bright red blood spurting out of the wound.

"Alex!" Gene yelled, getting up to go over to her. A kick to the chest threw him back down on the floor. Nigel planted a foot on his chest.

"This time, you die Hunt," he said, pulling his gun out of the back of his jeans. "Goodbye."

Gene threw one last look at Alex, who was unconscious once more, blood pouring over her shirt. He heard an explosion of gunfire and felt pain ripping through his chest.

_This is it, Gene, _he thought to himself. _Your miserable existence is finally finished. _

**I had said I wasn't gonna kill them but this whole crazy story happened and then this chapter...and now you have to wait til next week to find out whether or not they will live... :/**

**Thank you for the reviews last time! You all are amazing!**


	12. Chapter 12

**Thank you to those of you who reviewed last time! You all rock!**

**Chapter 12**

She felt as though she were floating in a fog. She could hear random sounds, the thunks of things hitting wood, the shouting of voices, but could put nothing together. There was pain, but there was always pain. Pain wasn't new to her.

The fog lifted slightly, and sight came back to her. She saw the three men shouting at cops, handcuffed and being led outside.

"Alex? Can you hear me Alex?" There was pressure put on her abdomen, and she felt stabbing pain in her stomach as Ray's face appeared above her. She wanted to say something, anything to him, but was unable to. Alex looked over at where Gene was, surprised to see that he was bleeding from a wound in the chest and appeared to be unconscious.

_The traitor betrayed,_ she thought grimly as the fog floated over her and sounds and sights went away.

When it faded once more, the sounds were different. There were still the voices, but now there was the beeping of machines all around her. To her surprise, the pain was gone.

She opened her eye slightly, but was now only staring through a tiny slit to the world beyond. She was in hospital. A bag of blood was hanging above her, and several other bags of fluid had not yet been started were lying on the counter next to her bed.

A strange face came into her field of vision, looking at her seriously. "You're with us, good. I'm Charlotte, your nurse. We're getting you ready for surgery. They're going to do some reconstruction while you're in there."

Alex tried to speak, but again, nothing would come out. She realised, however, that this time, something was _preventing _her from doing so.

Before she could investigate, the fog rolled back in. It started to lift a few times, but she was never able to do anything more than hear a few words here and there. None of any of the words made sense. She could still feel something in her throat, but she couldn't touch it. Whenever she reached up to try, something prevented her from reaching it.

After what seemed like an eternity, the fog seemed to dissipate and she was able to open her eyes to survey her surroundings. She was in hospital, but must have been critical enough to get a private room. There were bags of fluid hanging over her again, only this time they were attached to lines. She followed them down with her eyes, realising that they were going into a single point in her chest. Alex could feel that her right leg and left ankle were immobilised, as was her left hand and wrist. Still, she didn't seem to have any pain.

Alex became aware that there seemed to be the sound of oxygen being forced in and out of a tube. At the same time, she realised it was more difficult for her to breathe. Panicking, she reached up towards her neck, but her left arm stopped after a few inches. Her right arm was strapped to her chest, and so she could not move that either.

Alex tried to call for help, but her mouth was clenched shut, and she couldn't force it open. She found that she was unable to make any sounds at all, even a moan or a whimper.

Alex could feel the fear and panic rising within her, but forced herself to take several deep breaths. As she did this, she realised that her nose felt too swollen to breathe through, but she was getting oxygen all the same.

_I've got a tracheostomy,_ she realised. The tube in her throat was there to help her breathe, and since it was placed just below the vocal chords, they weren't able to vibrate properly to make sounds. Her left arm wouldn't move because they had restrained her so she wouldn't pull it out.

Just then, a nurse walked into the room. She didn't pay much attention to Alex, busy checking the lines that flowed into her central line. As she busied herself checking her drips, Alex immersed herself in thought. The last clear memory she had was a beating from Gene. He had carried her out for the rest of them to watch. Of course, that could have been a dream as well. The line between dream and reality had been blurred for a long while. Maybe this was just the product of a fever and the hope to be found. It would certainly explain the lack of pain.

"Alex, can you hear me?" the nurse said suddenly.

Alex opened her eyes, which she had not realised had drifted shut. The nurse smiled at her, making a note in her chart. "I'm your nurse, Mary. The swelling around your eyes has gone down."

Alex did nothing. It was pointless to try and talk, and she had no idea how her eyes had looked, so there was no point in nodding.

"Do you know where you are?" the nurse asked.

Alex nodded once.

"I'm going to ask you a few silly questions. Just answer me yes or no, okay?"

Alex nodded again.

The nurse asked a few questions to ensure that Alex really knew where she was, and continued to see if she knew the month. She finished by asking Alex if she knew why she was in hospital.

Alex raised her left hand off the bed as far as it would go, and tilted it from side to side.

"You came to us because you were having trouble breathing. That's why you have the tube in your throat."

Alex pointed up toward her mouth, hoping the nurse would understand the question.

"What's going on with your jaw?" the nurse hazarded.

Alex nodded.

"Do you want me to tell you all of your injuries?"

Alex nodded again.

"The reason you cannot move your mouth is because your jaw was broken. They fixed it, but wired it shut for it to heal. You had a fractured cheekbone as well, and a broken nose, along with two black eyes. Seven of your ribs are broken, and you broke the bone in your upper right arm. Your left wrist is broken, as well as three of the fingers on your left hand. The bones in the middle of your left foot are fractured, and there are four broken toes on that foot. Your kneecap on your right side is shattered, and they cleared up the bone fragments before setting it. You're going to need more surgery on that, I'm afraid. They want to put in a knee replacement, and do reconstructive surgery on your nose after the swelling goes down. The surgeons fixed your jaw in surgery, along with the holes caused by the knife in your abdomen."

Even if Alex had been able to speak, she would have been dumbstruck. She had no idea that her injuries had been that severe. She knew that she was in a lot of pain, but never imagined that she would need a knee replacement at thirty-three.

_Gene did this to me,_ she thought, feeling the hatred toward him rising. He was supposed to protect her, but no. Instead, he had gotten sucked into their way of thinking.

An image floated in front of her eyes, one of Gene on the floor, bloody from a wound to his chest. Had she just imagined that? Or had it really happened? Alex hoped it was real. After what he had done to her, she didn't care if they had killed him. It was a cold thing to think, but it was the truth. She had put all of her faith in him, and he had taken advantage of that.

The worst part was that she didn't know if he had lied about loving her either. All those times they had slept together, that connection she thought they had. Was it all false? When he threw his fists in her face, was he thinking of all the times he had nearly told her what he felt? But did he even mean that when he nearly said it? Or was it just a way to manipulate her?

"I understand that this is all a lot to take in at the moment," Mary said. "We're working on getting a pass flow valve for your trach, so you may talk, although it might still be difficult with your jaw. Once the swelling in your nose goes down a bit, it'll be easier to breathe without that tube and we'll take it out."

Alex lifted her left hand up, pointing with her eyes at the restraint. The nurse understood what she meant immediately. Obviously, that question was fairly common.

"I can't take off the restraint yet. I want to make sure that you stay oriented before I do. Otherwise, you might accidentally pull it out."

Alex nodded, understanding, but still disappointed. She felt trapped, more so than when she was kept prisoner. At least there she could move.

"You go ahead and rest. Your friends have been stopping by when they get off work to see you. They've been worried sick."

Something in Alex's face must have alerted Mary that she wanted to ask a question, because she put a pointer in Alex's hand and held a letter-board up.

_HOW LONG, _Alex spelled.

"This is day five. We weaned you off the ventilator yesterday, but it takes a while for sedation to wear off. You've been awake here and there, but never alert like you are now."

Alex nodded once, questions flying through her head. She had so much that she wanted...no, _needed _to know, and she wasn't even able to speak. They buzzed angrily in her head as she watched the nurse, but eventually fell silent as she drifted off into a dreamless sleep.

Once again, she heard the voices talking before she could open her eyes. Alex recognised her work mates immediately, smiling inwardly at the sound. She had really missed their drivel. Ray's constant reek of fags. Chris' hopeless attempts at understanding what Shaz was talking about. Three months ago she had despaired at it, but now she delighted in it. She had even dreamed about it at one point when she was imprisoned.

"They're keeping him until tomorrow," she heard Ray's voice say. "The docs wanted to keep him over the weekend, but he wasn't having it."

"Is he going to come up and see the ma'am at all?" Shaz asked. Alex felt herself stiffen. She knew who they were talking about and she didn't want to see him. She prayed for Ray to say no.

"He hasn't even mentioned her," Ray said. "There's something fucked up about that. You know how he was when she was missing."

"Even if they had a row, he would have asked about her," Shaz said.

"I know. The only time he said anything was right after he woke up when they took the vent out."

"When she asked if she was alive, right?" Chris asked.

"After that, he just dropped it all."

So he only cared that she was alive. He was probably figuring out how best to kill her now since their earlier attempt had been unsuccessful.

"I don't understand that at all," Shaz said. "If this was like the first time the Ma'am went missing, he would have been here as soon as he could sneak out of his bed. Don't you remember that he nearly killed Poirot?"

They all lapsed into silence. Alex didn't bother to open her eyes. She didn't want to try to interact with people when she wasn't able to speak.

She was drifting off to sleep again when Chris spoke.

"The Ma'am's looking a lot better."

"Somewhat. At least they got her off that bloody ventilator. I hate looking at people when they have those things."

"At least she didn't have the tube in her mouth, like the Guv did."

"No, they just sliced open her neck and shoved it in there instead," Ray responded rudely. "And she's all tied down. Just freaks me out. I bloody hate hospitals."

They lapsed into silence once more. Alex finally opened her eyes to see her work mates for the first time in three months. Ray no longer had his perm, but his awful moustache still crawled across his lip. Chris' highlights were still there; he looked unchanged. Shaz's hair was back in a ponytail and she looked a bit drawn, but otherwise okay.

As always, Shaz was the first to notice that Alex was awake. A huge smile crossed her face. "Ma'am! You're awake!"

At her words, Chris and Ray looked up, excited. Alex smiled at them, wriggling the fingers of her right hand as a hello.

They stayed for a while, telling her about the cases that the team had taken in the past three months. There was no mention of Gene, nor her captors, something Alex suspected was entirely intentional. Still, she didn't demand answers from them. As much as she wanted to know, she didn't think she was quite ready to.

Finally, the three got ready to leave. Alex was exhausted, she had forced herself to stay awake during their visit. She didn't want to sleep constantly, and figured the best way of getting into a schedule was to stay up a little later and sleep a little longer. This time, she had pushed herself to much. She knew that the moment they walked out of the room, she would be asleep.

"Do you need anything before we leave, Ma'am?" Shaz asked kindly. Alex nodded yes immediately. She had been thinking about it for a while now, and it was best to do it sooner rather than later.

"What can we do?"

This was the hard part. How was she supposed to say what she wanted? The nurse took the letter-board with her, and she couldn't use her hands to sign. She'd have to try and mouth the words.

After a few moments, Shaz understood. "I've got a mirror ma'am, but I don't know if..."

Alex put her right hand up, telling Shaz to stop. She needed to see herself.

"Okay," Shaz said uncertainly, reaching into her bag and pulling out a small mirror, which she held over Alex's face.

She didn't even recognise herself. She knew her face wouldn't be pretty, but she had hoped it didn't look like a complete disaster area. All her hopes had been in vain, however. Her eyes were still somewhat swollen, and most of her face was either purple or green. There were cuts on it, one of which had been stitched shut. Her nose was enormous, and had a lump on either side. She bared her teeth, seeing two metal bands on her gums which were held together by what looked like rubber bands. Several teeth were missing. Alex could also see the tube in her throat, which moved up and down with every breath she took.

_Gene did this to me, _she thought, staring at her mangled reflection. _And I'll be damned if I let him get away with it._

**Thanks to my ICU instructor who put up with 'When would they put in a trach instead of an ET (endotrachial) tube? What about ventilating through the nose? When would they do that? What if their mouth was broken? What if their nose was broken? How long would they keep the trach in for?' and much, much more. **

**And my posting may slow down (MORE?!) because instead of NaNoWriMo, my instructors seem to think it's NaRePaWriMo (National Research Paper Writing Month) I have just finished a big project and an 8 page paper this week, and now I've got to write another paper by next week. *Cries* **


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